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made a mistake, or is this normal?

(19 Posts)
Kissesgingers Wed 21-Jan-15 07:16:10

So pup came on Saturday, and I've been anxiously awake most of the night listening for "i need to go out" type noises, set my alarm for every 2.5 hours, she was peeing outside but for two nights now has pooped in her crate. I'm in tears that I've made a massive mistake getting a puppy, I've waited for this since I was 6, the children would never forgive me if she went back but I just feel sick that I don't know if I can carry on trying to guess every night when she needs to go. She cried the first two days to go out but last night, between 2.30 and 5, either she didn't cry or I didn't hear her. Please tell me it gets better.

Bananaapplegrape Wed 21-Jan-15 07:23:56

How old is she? Yoh have had her since Saturday? Give her a chance!!

If she's a puppy puppy (12 weeks or so) then she probably doesn't even know where she's meant to go yet! What are you doing when you take her outside in the night? Do you know what time she's pooing? Presume your actually checking on her throughout thr night not just listening out?

MinceSpy Wed 21-Jan-15 07:31:52

You've had the puppy four days and your in tears because of soiling in the crate. Line the crate with newspaper, puppy pads etc. Think of the puppy as a baby, toilet training takes time. If you can't cope then maybe you are unsuited to owning a,dog.

daisydotandgertie Wed 21-Jan-15 07:32:17

Why on earth would you be sending a tiny puppy back for pooing in the crate?

She is going to have accidents. It's what house training is all about - stop fretting about it. Just clear up and pop her outside again.

She won't know that you're expecting her to make a noise to let you know she needs to go out; she really won't. She is a real baby who doesn't have enough muscle control to keep poo or wee under control for long, nor does she have much bowel or bladder capacity.

It's not such a good idea to go to her whenever she squeaks anyway - you will forever have a dog who shouts for your attention. Ignore the noises at night; go in whenever you think is necessary - I'd say no more than every 4 hours - and put her outside. If there's a mess to clear up, clear it up and make no fuss.

It will get better as she grows, and as you learn her routine. She will get the hang of house training but there will be mistakes. It's normal. For heavens sake don't lie awake all night worrying and listening; you will be exhausted.

muttynutty Wed 21-Jan-15 07:56:01

You sound knackered emotional and worried not unusual but no need to be. Take her our last thing at night put her in her crate and you go to bed and then you sleep for 8 hours. Then first thing pop her out in the garden.

If she has weed and pooed clear it up and have a strong coffee smile

Pop the puppy in her crate at night with newspaper (Not puppy pads that encourages them to wee) and leave her to it.

Things will settle down and seem so much better when you have had some sleep.

Kissesgingers Wed 21-Jan-15 07:58:14

Thanks for replies. I haven't made any fuss about cleaning up, I'm not going every time she cries, but checking regularly, taking her out to go, not expecting her to " tell me" but the first two nights she seemed to have a different cry (in hindsight) for "lonely" and "need out" I guess lulled me into false security. She is 12 weeks and was in an outdoor run and shed with straw at a working gun dog kennel before we got her if that makes a difference. everyone's a first time dog owner once I guess

VeryStressedMum Wed 21-Jan-15 08:00:11

You must be exhausted if you've been up most big the night for 4 nights. A few accidents is ok she's just learning and so are you. Don't worry you haven't made a mistake and she doesn't need to go back it'll just take a while. You sound like you're trying to do the best for her and get it right, it will come together soon.
If she goes to sleep at 11 set your alarm for 2/3 and wait til she does something. If she's already soiled by that time set your alarm earlier. You'll be fine smile

Kissesgingers Wed 21-Jan-15 08:02:16

@muttynutty you got it, knackered and emotional! cross posted last post

SoMuchForSubtlety Wed 21-Jan-15 08:03:14

We bought a fence (I think it was designed to be an outside dog run) and put it up around our puppy's crate. We tied the crate door open then he could sleep in his crate and come outside it to pee and poo in the night - a plastic sheet plus some newspaper and it was easy to clean up. Dogs instinctively won't soil their bed, and puppy toilet training is about teaching them that the whole house is their "bed". So making sure she can get out of the crate if she needs to go is the first step.

Don't panic, you'll get there smile
The Perfect Puppy by Gwen Bailey is a great book if you want guidance - common sense and not preachy.

basildonbond Wed 21-Jan-15 08:32:49

Try to relax - having a puppy is supposed to be enjoyable! I knew I wouldn't sleep properly for the first couple of nights if I was listening out for him so I slept on the sofa next to the puppy's crate at first. He got up twice the first night, once the second and after that I'd take him out at about midnight for a last wee and he'd go through till about 6. Once I knew he was sleeping through I could relax and sleep properly myself. Pretty soon he started sleeping longer and I'll now put him in the garden at about 10 and that's him done until we get up in the morning - during the week we're up by 6:30 but he can happily last longer at the weekends (and usually goes straight back to sleep once he's wee'd and poo'd unrul the dc are up. Hang on in there - it gets much easier

ladydepp Wed 21-Jan-15 12:44:57

I spent the first week or two thinking I had made a massive mistake, the only thing that stopped me giving my dpup away was knowing my dc's would never forgive me! Fast forward a year and I couldn't imagine life without my doggie, she is part of the family and the thought of not having her is horrible.....

Try to remember that dogs really want to be loved and make your life better, especially if you've had them since puppy time. Praise/treat the good and try to ignore the bad was my mantra!

And I agree, the Perfect Puppy is a good resource.

Good luck - it really does get easier......

Kissesgingers Wed 21-Jan-15 13:43:26

Thanks for the posts it's good to hear I am not the first to feel like this.

JoffreyBaratheon Wed 21-Jan-15 14:03:12

You could also make a note of the times she poos and pees, then see if a pattern emerges over a few days.

Must admit after about Day 4, I was so exhausted I put her in her crate in the kitchen and slept right through. Amazingly, in the morning there was just one small wee and not on her blanket. Not a problem.

At 5 months she is still not fully housetrained in the daytime(we think she is one of those dogs that will just take longer). But she does go right through the night now with no accidents.

You will get there. You're understandably very tired at the mo, is all. And sounds like she's been a kennel dog so she may take a bit longer.

VeryStressedMum Wed 21-Jan-15 14:12:22

I love dogs and I love my puppy so much but in the last 6 weeks since I've had him I've thought on more than one occasion bloody hell I'm taking him back I can't stick this! It gets easier and easier as time goes on. One day very soon you'll wake up and realise she slept the whole night through. .mine took about two weeks ( not sure exactly as I think I've blocked out those hellish first few weeks).
This is my third puppy and it was still a shock grin

Panicmode1 Wed 21-Jan-15 15:38:16

I am three weeks in to new puppy ownership (and first time dog ownership) and yes, it's REALLY hard - I can't work out how to link to my thread, but if you search for "new puppy parents come and cheer me up" or something, you'll find loads of supportive threads!

I have had days where I've thought I've made a terrible mistake - not least because I thought I was doing quite well with my basic training, but last night at her first puppy class she was SO NAUGHTY we got put in the corner. At home she sits, comes well and lies down etc - she didn't come to me once last night and just got so overexcited...!

It will get better I am sure - hang on in there - and especially if you're sleep deprived!

SistersOfPercy Wed 21-Jan-15 16:38:49

My dog slept in the kitchen as a pup, he had a crate but it was left open overnight and we left a puppy pad by the door. I like my sleep so the thought of getting up at 3am to let him out horrified me.

He used the puppy pad overnight for about 7 months (he was fully trained in the day). I decided to take it up one night to see what happened and he went overnight without issues. From then on routine was he went out for a wee at 10pm and then would happily go overnight until the next morning.

It's very early days yet OP. If you aren't getting sleep you aren't in any mindset to deal with a puppy just doing what puppies do.

MsAdorabelleDearheartVonLipwig Wed 21-Jan-15 17:24:19

This will be me in a few weeks.

Well hopefully. grin

BabeRuthless Wed 21-Jan-15 19:01:31

Don't feel too bad. There's another thread on here for first time pup owners all sharing their tears! I remember ringing DP crying my eyes out because ds was refusing to put his shoes on, all this stemmed from the sleepless nights and the constant cleaning up of poo and wee ( from the dog, not ds) Having a puppy is the toughest thing I've ever done and at one point I would have merrily drop kicked the next person who said its just like having a baby. This phase will pass and like the other posters said I couldn't imagine life without our girl now.

Kissesgingers Thu 22-Jan-15 02:41:40

Thanking you all for passing the grip! Just got up at 145, woke dog up and spent a quiet 30 mins in the garden whilst kissespup pooped then went bonkers pelting up and down then finally peed. Am now going back to sleep til 6 and if I have to clean up before the school run, so be it. 2x 3.5 hours sleeps is better than the last 4 days. And, kissespup rolled over today during a cuddle so I could rub her tummy and did that oh so cute thing where the back leg twitches as you rub!

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