End stage liver thingy - I'm heartbroken :(((

[LaurieFairyCake]

My lovely dog has liver failure. Function tests are awful and his spleen/gall bladder are covered in masses. His liver looks horrible on screen, all dark and abnormal.

He has been my constant shadow since we adopted him and he would be 14 in February.

I don't know what to do but the vet said the moment his quality of life reaches that point to bring him in - he ate his dinner today because I encouraged him by mixing it with pate.

He's still like a total puppy in his head
Bounces up then realises his body doesn't do it.

I lost my favourite cat (his best friend) this week last year and I just cried for days - now he's going Im just bereft.

He's lying next to me now wondering why mummy gave him ham when he's had a healthy diet his whole life til the last couple of days.

I love him so much

[SingingTunelessly]

Oh Laurie, I'm sorry. It's so hard to deal with isn't it.

[holmessweetholmes]

Aww. So sorry . We've just got our first dog. It must be awful when that time comes.

[CarbeDiem]

I'm so sorry Laurie :(
That's awful.
I've lost an old girl some years back. I'd finally made the appt to have her PTS after much heartbreak....she passed away peacefully, in her favourite spot on the sofa 2 days before the appt - I like to think she knew how much I didn't want to take her.

I hope your boy has a comfortable, pain free and happy time as possible.
I bet he enjoyed the ham, you give him what you and he want.
Big hugs to you both
Take care Xx

[JoffreyBaratheon]

You spoil him. We lost our 14 year old dog in September. I still cry every day and miss her horribly. We now have a new pup, born 2 days before our old lady died, coincidentally. It does nothing for the grief but it keeps me occupied. One of my biggest regrets is, that last day, not giving her all her favourite things. I think I was just too thunderstruck by it all.

Be kind to yourself in this difficult time. You will know when the time has come.

[LaurieFairyCake]

Thank you all for your kindness.

He's had sausages this morning and a pile of liver last night - so he thinks I'm the best mummy in the world today

[EveDallasRetd]

As long as a dog dies with someone who loved him crying over him, then he's had a 'good' death. Peaceful, loved and full of his favourite things - we should all be so lucky.

RottDog ate a full pound of sausages shortly before we said goodbye, and died peacefully and happily with a tennis ball in her mouth.

So sorry Laurie, be good to him, but be good to yourself too x

[JoffreyBaratheon]

Eve, you just set me off again. xxx

My little girl was always terrified of the vet's as she had some serious operations when she was 4 and ever afterwards was so afraid, she'd sometimes pass out just being in the surgery. So we were dreading taking her. We didn't have enough money to pay for the vet to come to our house so we knew we were going to have to take her there.

I was too heartbroken to face researching it so I only looked this up afterwards but no-one told us that you can ask for the dog to be sedated first so being PTS is less traumatic.

I had been with much younger dogs being PTS and they seem to pass without any trauma and instantaneously. But the two older dogs I have been with, fast but not instant.

It was only as she was doing it, the vet said casually to us "Sometimes it takes a bit longer with an oldie as their circulation may be compromised." Ah great. Why didn't you forewarn us? This sounds horrible, but I am sharing it as I wish someone had forewarned me. I would have saved up the extra to have her sedated first, had I known.

I feel really bad putting this here but it occurred to me just now this is info I wish someone had given me before the event, however hard it would have been to read. I am trying to remember my little girl as she was - sweet, happy, gentle, very very much loved. But it gets a bit overshadowed by that day which - had I known she could be sedated - would have been easier. All made worse by the fact she loathed the vet's, too. So this wouldn't apply to every dog.

[CarbeDiem]

so he thinks I'm the best mummy in the world today smile
To him you are, you're his mummy and he loves you with or without the treats.
Hope he's happy enough today Laurie Xx

Don't beat yourself up Joff You did your best for your old girl and if you'd have known then yes, the sedation probably would have settled her a bit better but you were there for her and she had her ever loving mummy with her as she passed. Xx

[MsAdorabelleDearheartVonLipwig]

So sorry you're going through this Laurie but I could have written your post because we're going through it too. My old boy needs to eat the liver diet food that the vet has given him but he won't touch it. It's his last chance. The vet said this weekend will be his last because we can't leave him in this state but he just won't eat anything. I totally agree but I just keep thinking there must be something we can do.

It's so shit isn't it. Why can't they live a bit longer?

Joff you set me off again.

Big hugs Laurie and I couldn't care less if it's unmumsnetty.

[LaurieFairyCake]

So sorry to read your post MsAdorable

I think it's over once they stop eating - is there nothing that will tempt him?

Poor boy

[EasyToEatTiger]

I'm so sorry. When our oldie was ill last year, I would have used any snake oil to keep him going. Anything. I wanted magic. Big hugs to you.

[MsAdorabelleDearheartVonLipwig]

Well he'll have a small mouthful of pate or ham but that's about it. You're right, it's like he's given up.

Just can't bear to admit it. He's been my shadow and our constant companion for eleven years. It won't seem like home anymore without him.

[lemisscared]

They are just on loan to us aren;t they :( Its so so hard to let them go, but its the kindest thing you can do for them.

You can have sedation if you want, but honestly, it is not necessary unless you have a dog that is likely to resist an injection into a vein, it is very quick, painless and peaceful.

[MsAdorabelleDearheartVonLipwig]

I remember when we had a cat put to sleep years ago. It was very quick. She didn't close her eyes. She lay there on the table and her eyes were all glassy. It wasn't very nice.

Do vets still do home visits for that then? I would much prefer that.

[MsAdorabelleDearheartVonLipwig]

How's it going Laurie?

[atonofwashing]

Aww, I am sorry.
Loss of appetite is the last thing you want to see.
Not sure what else to say, everyone has said it all.
We adopted our girl too, and she made it to 14. It's an age to be proud of.
You have my thoughts.

[flyinghogfish]

So sorry to hear you are going through this, sending hugs x we are also facing having our 16 year old collie pts, his arthritis is bad, he's also blind and deaf. We have given it serious thought all week, but have come to the decision to take him in Friday and let him go with the dignity he deserves, surrounded by all of us. I have to make the phone call to the vets today.
Sending you lots of love and positive thoughts xx

[MsAdorabelleDearheartVonLipwig]

Oh flying, so sorry.

We lost our old boy on Sunday. He just couldn't go on any longer and we had to make a decision. It was bloody awful. Dh and I are still crying. But we couldn't have done any more, he had reached the end and it was clearly time. They say better a week too early than a day too late. I couldn't let him suffer.

Hope things are ok Laurie.

[LaurieFairyCake]

Thank you all so much and so sorry to hear about your losses.

The last 24 hours have been a bit hairy with diarrhoea/mucus and I thought it was time as he wouldn't eat his dinner last night.

And then DH came home and he yummed it up and asked for more. And he ate 2 extra bowls last night (I've stopped feeding him sausages/liver in case it was that).

And then the next 2 bowel movements were normal.

So we think he's just becoming a bit 'needing both of us around' and feels extra secure if we're just both here and focusing on him. Then he will eat.

There really is just days in this according to the vet but right now he seems 'ok' ish. Though he is grumbling because I don't think his tummy is great as he keeps needing the loo.

[MsAdorabelleDearheartVonLipwig]

Well that's good news for now. At least he's being a bit more like himself and is happier and you're enjoying some nice time together. Just make the most of it and don't waste a second just in case it all goes wrong again. Although I'm sure he knows you love him.

[LaurieFairyCake]

Today is his last day and we're off to the vets later. He got distressed last night and wakened up in a massive pile of mucusy poo - he did not enjoy being bathed in the middle of the night.

He's had a good meal today and he's going to snooze in front of the fire this afternoon until DH comes homes and we go.

I can see he's not happy any more and I know today's the right day.

Heartbroken, I feel hysterical inside

[atonofwashing]

Oh dear, I am sorry for you and ddog.
(((Hugs))) to you at an awful time.

[CarbeDiem]

Oh no!
So sorry Laurie.
Thinking about you all and (((hugs)))

[brunette123]

I am thinking for you how heartbreaking for you. You have given him a fantastic life. Sadly I have been through this twice. It is absolutely gut wrenching and I felt panicky. I am so sorry that you are having to say goodbye.

[MsAdorabelleDearheartVonLipwig]

Oh Laurie I am so sorry.

I know what you mean about feeling hysterical. I kept thinking 'but this is wrong, we can't do this, we've got to give him another chance'. The vet told us that our boy was so ill that he wouldn't last much longer and it would be the kindest thing to let him go but I still felt all panicky inside that we might be wrong.

I'm so sorry you're going through this. There are no words that can bring any comfort, I wish there were, but you have to let yourself grieve.

Hope you're ok.