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Telling DC's of the dog's death

(7 Posts)
onetiredmummy Mon 15-Apr-13 12:24:15


My exH & I bought a dog in 2001, when we split in 2009 I moved into rented accomodation so had to leave her with the exH. My 2 DC see her every time they visit so once every 3 weeks. She is a beautiful little Shetland Sheepdog & I miss her even now.

My exH has just phoned, unfortunately she has had a stroke & been left blind & without the use of her hind legs so exH is taking her to the vet's later with a view to having her put to sleep (subject to the vet's opinion obv).

So how do I tell the DC's, do I tell them? Do I leave it to exH as she became essentially his dog ? ExH's idea was that we tell them together next time he comes to collect them, but I think that may ruin their weekend together & perhaps they will need more time to get used to the idea she's gone before they visit him again. My 3 year old I'm not that worried about, its my super sensitive 7 year old that will be upset. We won't have a body so we can't do a funeral type thing in the back garden.

Coincidentally we've been talking about having a rescue cat recently, shall I leave it a bit before introducing another animal?

Any opinions that you have are great.

JaxTellerIsAllMine Mon 15-Apr-13 12:33:19

Tell the children the truth. Dont say "got put to sleep" - explain what was wrong, how poorly the dog is and that the vet had to treat dog/that it died.

We have had this happen recently and while my DS13 took it well, DD9 was very upset. We talked about how dogs get old quite quickly and we have to be kind to them and make sure the animals have quality of life. We also talked about fun times we had together with the dog/s.

It is very hard, maybe you could say that Dads dog was very ill and had to go to the vet. With possibility it may pass away - then depending on information from ex you can go from there.

Im sorry you have to do this. sad

JaxTellerIsAllMine Mon 15-Apr-13 12:34:40

oh, sorry missed the cat part - I would leave it for a little while. A cat cant replace another animal, but may heal the sorrow for your DC. Maybe go to look at rescue places together?

MrsWolowitz Mon 15-Apr-13 12:38:50

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

onetiredmummy Mon 15-Apr-13 12:39:06

Thanks Jax

I'm thinking of telling him about Rainbow Bridge too.

onetiredmummy Mon 15-Apr-13 12:41:06

Thanks MrsWolowitz

I'm sorry to hear of your dog flowers

bishboschone Mon 15-Apr-13 12:44:50

I agree about telling the truth. It's a tough lesson. I had a childhood filled with animals and I still remember the pain of losing the first dog !hmm I'm not sure about rainbow bridge . I took comfort from it as and adult when i ha my horse pts but I'm pretty sure a child would take it literally and will expect it to actually happen.

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