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Please help - finding this tough!

(90 Posts)
doublemocha Wed 07-Nov-12 10:21:46

Please help/encourage me!

We have had our new puppy since Saturday. He's lovely and sweet and hard work obviously.

I need some help with crate training. On the advice of our breeder and friends with well behaved dogs and specifically close friends with a Vizsla (our puppys sister from a previous litter) we decided to do the 'tough it out at night' method. We don't want him upstairs.

Well, I have hardly slept since Saturday and desperately unsure what's the right thing to do.

First night we did go down to him but he wanted to play at 1.30pm, DH not impressed, ended up soothing him to sleep so bad move. The night after he got out as DD hadn't shut the bottom latch and pooed all over the floor then slept on my coat. Monday night was tough. Last night, he was super tired as he had been over with our friends Vizsla playing (they live over the road). Went to bed at 9.30pm (couldn't keep him awake). We woke at 11pm and cried for 90 minutes, then woke on and off all night but cried for 10-15 minutes. I got up with him at 5.15am as he was quiet then and I didn't want him to be crying when we went down. he hadn't wee'd or pooed.

Big play session, food etc, toilet etc now he's howling in his crate.

Been out for an hour to do some chores and he's still howling, although think he did have a sleep.

I am so tired and confused about what to do. My house is a tip, I can't get any work done, confused as to how often to play with him etc etc. I have even got angry with him and shouted, which I am ashamed of.

Please don't flame me, I am so tired and down, I don't even feel like I even like him........

I need him to be crate trained so i can go out etc.

JaxTellerIsMyFriend Thu 08-Nov-12 15:57:29

It sounds like what you did this afternoon is perfect.

When you are at home, I wouldnt close the crate door all the time - I sometimes shut it, but didnt lock it.

Remember to give a 'command' when you are toileting - busy, be quick, whatever you want to call it. grin and gentle smiley praise "good busy" when they do their business.

Inthepotty Thu 08-Nov-12 17:20:55

OP, calm down! I know it seems overwhelming, but puppies aren't really the hardest thing in the world.

Pop him in crate when u need too, play with/small training sessions when you want too. Make sure food and toileting needs are met and adopt a benign neglect policy!

Basically I agree with Daisy.

WTFwasthat Thu 08-Nov-12 20:49:49

I Certainly don't play with pup all day. I chat a bit and interact with training etc and i wave a toy at him to have a game of tuggy. He seems very happy about his level of care though smile

TantrumsAndBalloons Thu 08-Nov-12 21:05:50

I don't play with mine all day either!

Although to be fair, I am probably the worst person to give advice on crating as mine sleep upstairs.

Honestly, you really seem to be so anxious.

I think you have to do what feels right to you rather than focusing on whether everyone else thinks you are doing it right

If you want the dog to sleep in a crate, carry on with what you are doing. If you want the dog to sleep in the utility room, or in your bed, it's ok. It's up to you.

If you want to take the dog in the car, do it however works best for you.
If you want to chat away to the dog all day, yes, also fine.

I take my dogs to work with me, LittleDog since he was 4 months old. Everyone chats away to them. It's lovely.

Just try and relax. Try not to worry if you are doing it the right way.
Try and enjoy it a bit.

WTFwasthat Thu 08-Nov-12 22:00:42

tantrums good advice

doublemocha Fri 09-Nov-12 06:37:55

Quick update!

We are all bonded! DH slept downstairs with him last night, not a peep from him and is completely on board, loves him to pieces. That was half the battle tbh, feeling the guilt of bringing him into the house. And being knackered!!!

DH alarm went off at 5.15am which woke him but he sat in his crate chewing. Toilet break, small cuddle with DH and he's asleep on DH's sleeping bag. DH can't wait for the weekend to be with him. He just needed a few days to accept the changes.

I love him more each time I look at him.

You guys are right, I always want to do it the 'right' way, but the right way is what's right for us, I realise that now.

I also left him for 40 mins last night and went to our friends for a drink, he didn't seem to mind.

Just want to voice my appreciation for those who posted understanding messages and advice, I needed to hear it yesterday!


TantrumsAndBalloons Fri 09-Nov-12 06:45:42

I'm really pleased for you. You see, it's going to be ok.
Relax and have fun, puppies are amazingly good fun.
Stroppy, rebellious adolescent dogs who forget everything you ever taught them, however are not so much fun.

<glares at *LittleDog>

WTFwasthat Fri 09-Nov-12 07:11:32

doublmocha - glad to hear it! If u are anything like me you will still have moments of doubt and anxiety - mine is based on leaving him in his crate while i pop out, I constantly feel as ifbi am racing against the clock and I hate that!

catsrus Fri 09-Nov-12 07:20:40

Brilliant :-) once he knows he's "home" then he will get more and more comfortable with being left alone.

LadyTurmoil Fri 09-Nov-12 16:41:03

doublemocha SO pleased to read your post earlier today. How nice of DH to sleep downstairs with him, as he's not been feeling as his best recently himself, and how great that he feels more positive about it all now. How lovely it must have been to get a decent night's sleep! Really glad for you and fingers crossed for another quiet night Don't forget some of this wine smile

JaxTellerIsMyFriend Sat 10-Nov-12 09:15:16

keep going DM it will all work out. relax. grin

WTFwasthat Sun 11-Nov-12 08:56:58

How's it going DoybleMocha? I had a surge of WtF have I done today!!

charlearose Sun 11-Nov-12 19:32:08

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

charlearose Sun 11-Nov-12 19:35:54

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

WTFwasthat Sun 11-Nov-12 20:45:21

charlearose- what a great post. Everytime I have a minor wobble i remind myself that Max is happy, well cared for, loved and he is not judging me! Hope op reads this :-)

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