Bad experience with visit to rescue, where do I go from here?(49 Posts)
I visited a rescue today and it went really badly, I ended up in tears any advice on where to go from here would be appreciated, before I end up looking for a dog in the paper.
Basically, I had previously been told by someone there over the telephone that today was the best time to visit, and yesterday (which was when I originally planned to go) was bad.
I took time of work today to go, and found that actually it was the worst time possible. Everyone was rushing about sorting out dogs which had just arrived, and we were obviously in the way
Two girls were sent to show us around, I asked for their advice on what dog would best suit our family, and they led my and my two kids over to a kennel with springer spaniel pups in it. They encouraged me to apply for one of these, and when I said yes, called someone over.
I had already put in an application for another pup via their website, which I had missed out on, and had been advised by the person who called to 'interview me' that a pup would be the best match for us, anything except terriers and collies, and that a spaniel would be perfect. He said they would be happy to home a puppy with us, providing they could check out some of the information I gave them, and subject to a home check.
The person they called over asked me what hours I worked, and without giving me a chance to explain our circumstances properly started (quite aggresively) to say that we could not home a pup, we would not know what to expect, that a spaniel would need at least 4 hours excercise (before asking how much exercise we would expect to give it) it would mouth and nip our kids, and I would send it back. When I said we wouldn't he said, yes you would, you're a mum, you might say you won't but you will (not exact words probably, but pretty close)
I did ask what he would suggest, and said we would appreciate as much advice as possible, but he did not seem to be interested in speaking with me at all.
I felt very uncomfortable, and could feel my eyes filling up, so I told the kids that everyone was busy, and it was not a good time for us to be there, and took the kids back to the car.
After calming down a little, I left my children in the car in the carpark, and went back alone to ask if I could speak with someone, to clarify if they would consider us at all. I spoke with someone else there, who did check my application, question me more about how we would look after a dog etc, and seemed more positive. She told me to keep checking their website, and try applying again.
However, the person who was so negative, is the manager, so I don't know if it's even worth me trying again.
Where can I go from here?
He sounds like he was having a bad day and acting like a bit of a moron. Call and speak to him and explain how you felt following his interaction with you.
Or, if you can't bear dealing with him again then go to a different rehoming centre.
Try a different rescue before the newspaper, please! Hopefully someone will be along who can recommend a good one - may help if you can say what area you live in.
If you have some idea of the type of dog you want - contact the breed rescue association - most breeds have one. They will know the breed inside out and be able to tell you if that type of dog would suit you. They also tend to have a bit more time to properly assess the dogs.
We got ours from The Samoyed Rescue association who were great. I grew up with Sammys and adore them - although they need a lot of exercise - they are brilliant with kids as well.
Good luck. All of us in our house are resues (dog, cat, husband, me) - and we all appreciate a loving home.
Thanks for replies everyone, I do really want to go down the rescue route, but felt so disheartened, I don't know if I can face it again . I know that we would be responsible owners, but it's hard to convince someone else of that when they are judging you by past experience.
The lady I spoke with a little later said they had recently had a similar pup retuned to them from a home with young kids, so I suppose that was fresh in his mind.
We would actually prefer a crossbreed, as my husband is very anti dog breeding, so I don't know if breed rescues are the best bet for us. I will try to contact some other local ones. Thanks all
I'm sorry that you experienced this.
I can only say though that I can identify with the manager even if his people skills and attitude were far from impressive. We DO see far too much of the behaviour he described. This is why many rescues won't rehome to people with young children at all.
Only last week did a rescue I know well get a call from some stupid twunts who wanted to rehome their 17 week old Jack Russell puppy because the woman had just had a baby and they claimed they "couldn't cope" with a dog as well. Do the maths - she would have been about 7 months pregnant when they bought the dog, it's not as if she didn't know that a baby was on its way.
The day after she approached that rescue, who being full as ever couldn't help but promised to find someone who would, the stupid bitch sold the puppy to a stranger on a free ads website.
It's constant, that sort of thing, we are all SO wearied of it, so cross and yes, bloody cynical too. The man was out of order for speaking to you as he did but I'd ask you to understand why he is like that and not to be put off of rescue by one experience and one individual. We're not all like that!
I do understand why he was short tempered, but I was upset as I have previously applied, and been told that everything with the application was fine
He hadn't even looked at this, and pretty much seemed to rule us out based on past experience.
I tried to do everything correctly, I arranged to go when I was told it was best (even though this turned out to be wrong) I asked for their advice on the best dog to fit our family, and ruled out anything they advised against. I researched as much as I could. I was prepared to put in the work needed for a pup, although I oiginally would have preferred an older dog.
I just don't know what else I can do, except get rid of my kids, pack in my part time job, and buy a dodgily bred dog to get experience!
(obviously I would not not do any of the above, I am just ranting)
I have checked the other local rescues, but there does not seem to be many dogs that would fit our family.
I guess I will have to either stick to checking rescues religiously, or give up on the idea.
If we end up going down the route of buying from a breeder, can you give me any tips on how to spot and avoid dodgy ones? We definately do not want a pedigree to show or breed ourselves, we just want to enjoy a family pet
There's more than one rescue. Where are you in the country? I am sure Mnetters will point you in the direction of some good ones.
If you go to the kennel club website, IIRC they have some pretty sensible advice on breeders.
If you don't want to show or breed, breeders sometimes have older dogs who they'd kept but which didn't make the grade and so want pet homes - that's how we came by our lovely dog at 10 months old. If you continue to draw a blank with rescues and don't particularly want a pup this could be an alternative.
minimu11, nothings come through, but I may not be checking in the right place, it's the inbox at the top isn't it? I am in South Wales DooinMeCleanin. I have just tried calling two others. One will not consider us, because my youngest child is 4, the other is engaged. I will not give up yet lol. Thanks all, I am feeling more positive now
DO NOT GO ON THE KENNEL CLUB WEBSITE FOR BREEDERS!
You have no idea how many puppy farmed dogs are KC registered nowdays - KC means sod all, neither does KC accreditation.
If you want to go to a breeder approach the breed club.
I would beg you not to of course but I'm biased, I see too many dogs being killed in pounds.
You sound like the sort of family most rescues would like to see more of to me. And, btw, matey was right, a pup will mouth you and your kids but a pup does NOT need and nor is it a good thing to give him 4 hours of exercise a day! Pups sleep a lot just like human babies and have developing bones so need limited exercise when growing!
Personally I wouldn't home a Springer pup into a novice household with young kids as they are too demanding and in time WILL need lots of exercise and mental stimulation so I'm not sure that rescue matey you met is entirely suited to his job tbh!
Where are you? Perhaps I can suggest some rescues for you?
South Wales, hmmm...
Have you spoken to Many Tears?
ScuttleButter is Wales based, she will have some ideas. she will probably suggest a Greyhound! Actually, you could do a lot worse than a Greyhound come to think of it.
Oh how frustrating!
Try another? Perhaps the one we used might be useful although it's in Somerset. They were very helpful. I am wondering if they might all be a little reluctant to offer a puppy though given the age of your children and the fact that you are out at work all day. Would you consider an older dog? Ours was 11m old when we got him.
DosBestFriend, Yes lol, it didn't go too well
I am open to ideas, but I dont think my bunny would appreciate a greyhound moving in
I got the impression that the OP has work hours covered Orm although matey wouldn't let her explain that before writing her off (or else I'd be saying don't get a dog at all!).
Ormirian, I am happy to home an older dog, as long as it can fit in with our existing pets. It was someone at the rescue involved who originally suggested a pup would be a better fit. If I could avoid housetraining I would jump at the chance.
I will look at your link now
Yes, work hours covered. With fall back plans in case also
south wales? have you tried croft kennels in coity ,bridgend
Hi OP, I'm also based in S Wales, and can guess which rescue this was, as not many actually have their own kennels - was it All Creatures Great and Small or Llys Nini? Alternatively, you may have visited a pound, such as Cardiff or Newport? PM me if you don't feel comfortable naming them publicly.
I'd urge you not to give up on a rescue dog. You've had a rotten experience, but there are lots of good rescues out there, and lots of lovely dogs waiting for a home. As DBF says, yes, a greyhound might suit your family very well. They are gentle, placid dogs, and you will be helping a retired racer. They often come off the track at a very young age, barely two, and live well into their mid teens.
Greyhound Rescue Wales will home to families with young children, you wont' visit the kennel, they will match a dog to you, that you will then get to meet. Have a look at their website www.greyhoundrescuewales.co.uk for a feel on some of the dogs they have. Greyhound Welfare also are active in S Wales and again will home to families depending on your circumstances. Greyhounds don't need masses of exercise and like having a comfy sofa to sleep on.
You could also try Hope Rescue - they don't have a blanket no children policy - it is sensibly dependent on the dog. And although they are technically a pound, there are some nice dogs at Crofts near Bridgend.
If you are in SW Wales have you tried Lizzies Barn or Swiss Valley Greyhounds?
Having a rabbit doesn't necessarily rule out a greyhound completely. My wee foster girl has lived happily with Guinea Pigs in a previous foster home. Scuttle knows the Greyhound rescues in Wales.
Iirc Doris Banham rehome throughout the country? I'm DBF will set me right if I am wrong.
DooinMeCleanin, will you post her here if I pay for stamps lol
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