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The doghouse

So I phoned a re-homing centre about a dog

25 replies

SherlockMoans · 10/06/2011 20:56

and came off the phone feeling like I was a crack dealer trying to adopt a baby.

Is this a deliberate tactic to see how committed to adopting a dog we are or is the kind of person attracted to that vocation just completely disfunctional when it comes to humans (not my first experience of it!)

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2T2T · 10/06/2011 21:06

SherlockMoans - I feel your pain!!! I have just started a thread about the difficulties facing us as potential dog rehomers! I haven't been to a shelter yet b ut have filled in online adoption forms and feel like I am being scrutinised! I understand that have to get things absolutely rigbht for the dogs but honestly, I completely get where you are coming from! Hop over to my thread about never finding a rescue dog - plenty of advice there!
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SherlockMoans · 10/06/2011 21:14

The stupid thing is I had a bitch straight from her litter and she died aged 11 - I KNOW I am capable of having a happy well adjusted dog but she made me feel completely inadequate.

I work from home so pretty much here all the time

My children are dog savvy

Whole family are committed to it & looking forward to long walks

I appreciate that even a trained may have "accidents" in its new house

I am happy to/looking forward to training it.

Dont know what the f*ck else they want!

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ThunderboltKid · 10/06/2011 21:19

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn at poster's request

SherlockMoans · 10/06/2011 21:26

Yep - countryside too

large enclosed garden

Was very clear when asked that the "colour" of the dog was of minimal importance (so not accessorising it with my life) - all I ask is for it to not eat the children or fight with other dogs

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DogsBestFriend · 10/06/2011 21:34

You tick all the boxes for me so far so what was the problem?

(BTW, rescuers don't start off dysfunctional, bad owners and abusers turn them that way!).

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DogsBestFriend · 10/06/2011 21:36

Oh and yes, it IS in order to find out if you're committed and suitable. It weeds out the timewasters and idiots (lots of those about sadly) in the early stages without rescue, most of whom are unpaid volunteers in independent rescues, wasting precious time.

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SherlockMoans · 10/06/2011 21:43

I really dont know, I HATE phoning people and she just let me TALK so I ended up babbling like an idiot Blush

I also said to her that its OK looking at a picture of a dog on a website but that until you meet it you dont KNOW its the dog for you and I was happy to take guidance from her as to what she thought suitable.

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DogsBestFriend · 10/06/2011 21:57

"she just let me TALK so I ended up babbling like an idiot"

I do that all the time,I don't need to wait to talk to rescue to achieve the babbling idiot award! :o

Please don't take it personally. It's all as much for your sake as it is the dog's or the rescue's. For example, if they don't check that your DH is on board too and they rehome to you regardless the chances are that in a months time you will be asking them to take the dog back and en route to the divorce court. Not good for anyone, you especially.

It sounds like you have found a very good rescue if they're being particular and asking lots of questions before meeting you. Take it as a positive thing. :)

Assuming that they homecheck, assess, neuter, vaccinate and contract to take the dog back then chances are it is a very good rescue. Don't risk putting yourself at risk of heartache by accepting any less.

So how did you leave it? Do they have a dog to suit you and are you going to visit them or have they offered to homecheck you first?

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SherlockMoans · 10/06/2011 22:04

possibly i've got to call back. I think they homecheck and chip not sure about the rest (I guess it depends on the age of the dog) but im now also considering the local blue cross who do all of it - im happy to wait for the right dog...the children are not quite so patient!!

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DogsBestFriend · 10/06/2011 22:06

Blue Cross should be a good place to go too although it may depend on the ages of your children. Most of the big rescues have blanket policies about young DC, independents tend to be more flexible.

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SherlockMoans · 10/06/2011 22:09

I noticed that dogs trust seem to have hardly any suitable for this age (youngest is 8)

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DogsBestFriend · 10/06/2011 22:15

I don't know if Herts is way out of your area but Heathlands are very reputable and they will rehome dogs to families with children if the dog is suitable and they will rehome out of their area as long as they can secure a homecheck.

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DogsBestFriend · 10/06/2011 22:17

*Sorry, I meant that I don't know if they are out of your area insofar as you will need to visit the Heathlands at some stage to meet the dog of your choice.

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chickchickchicken · 10/06/2011 22:18

we rehomed one of ours from dogs trust when we were fostering (humans Smile) from age 3yrs. i would recommend building a good relationship with the rescue/s and going from there.

remember they do want to rehome their dogs and are just minimising the chances of it going wrong and the poor dog being returned to kennels (even with checks i have known for dogs to be returned for such silly things as looking too big on the rug in front of the fire when he was fully stretched out. in this case the adopter was put out that this hadnt been explained to her as she hadnt thought how big the dog would look led down in her sitting room).

for your sake, and especially your dcs sake, it is less heartbreaking for them to take the time and ensure a good match for your family, after all you hope for many happy years together. good luck

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2T2T · 10/06/2011 22:31

sherlock - agree about the over 8's thing - very frustrating

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Scuttlebutter · 11/06/2011 00:02

I discuss some of the questions asked during homechecks over on the other thread started by 2T. Unfortunately you only have to see some of the regular situations that come up on the Doghouse to understand why rescues ask. Actually when we do a homecheck we are interested in whether you will provide a good, long term, stable home for the dog. So yes that means finding out if all the adults in the house are on board with the idea. It means finding out if you own or rent and checking out your garden fences, along with your expectations about dog ownership. The question about colour is because many potential adopters are reluctant to home black dogs - a well researched fact that applies to all breeds. Black dogs are much harder to home and that is why websites like this one exist.

Statistically, many marriages break up after the birth of the first child so that is why we ask about family plans, and it is also sadly true that many people rehome dogs when they have small children or new babies as they simply find it too much work. This is partially why many rescues simply don't allow adoptions to families with young kids. Even if they do, they will want to be sure you fully understand your responsibilities, and the financial commitment too particularly vets bills, insurance etc. They will also want to assess your knowledge and expectation of what breed/type of dog you want, what other pets and animals live with you, what activities you do/could do with the dog, your holiday plans, family support, working patterns and so on.

They ask all this not because of any views on you personally but because when dealing with large numbers of people certain key issues are often a trigger for dogs coming back/placements not working and dogs that have "bounced" are always that much harder to rehome the second time.

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LordOfTheFlies · 11/06/2011 01:23

Slightly off-track, but why are black dogs harder to home?
Black horses and black cats are premium colours.

I know the beleif about the black dog not letting Mohammed into heaven( Muslim collegue told me) but I can't believe thats the real reason for the widespread dislike of black dogs Hmm

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emptyshell · 11/06/2011 12:38

Black and white cats are meant to be similar in the rehoming stakes - just overlooked in favour of their snazzier counterparts.

I somehow ended up with a black and white feline tripod and a mostly black dog. Yes I rang the Cats Protection and told them I was a sucker for a hard luck story (which makes rescue people squeal with joy I discovered!) and ended up with the indestructible (she must be about 10 years+ now, not showing it at all and she's had to go to the vet ill ONCE in her entire life - meaning I wasted all those insurance premiums but I'm still glad I have it) special needs cat!

Oh never ever ever ever ever rehome a black dog with one white leg - it gets very wearing getting the jokes about him looking like he's got a bandage on it and smiling politely (I just joke they'd ran out of black and brown fur when making him so bodged it with what was left)!

The only issue I have with my black dog is he doesn't half suffer in the heat - meaning I spend half my time climbing through bushes encouraging him to plonk himself in the streams where we tend to walk. He don't half have a shiny coat though - puts the girls in the shampoo adverts to shame!

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catinthehat2 · 11/06/2011 12:54

"Black horses and black cats are premium colours"

but I seem to remember a thread in the last few months about black cats being hard to home tho'

will try to dig it out

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catinthehat2 · 11/06/2011 12:56

here it is

it's very strange

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Scuttlebutter · 11/06/2011 13:40

I've never heard about black dogs and Mohammed, no idea about that.

Black dogs historically are often the subject of folk tales or superstitions - many ancient tales about black dogs being harbingers of death etc. Some of that superstition seems to have lingered. People seem to find them less "cuddly" or more threatening perhaps? Personally, we have two black greys and they gleam in the sun - the coats are like black satin - and I've never even thought about it. It just is one of those strange things that occur in dog rescues - there have been quite a few studies on it, showing this colour preference.

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Ephiny · 11/06/2011 13:51

I think black dogs just look less pretty or appealing to some people than the lighter coloured once. They don't photograph so well either, so don't grab people's attention on websites/leaflets/posters etc.

I have to admit I had a bit of a preference for a light-coloured dog once - no idea why, it just seemed 'nicer', just irrational prejudice. I'm ashamed of myself now but that's how it was. Now have a (mostly) black dog and I think he's absolutely beautiful, as well as being the best, sweetest dog I could have hoped to have in my life, I can't believe how lucky we were to find him :)

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emptyshell · 11/06/2011 13:51

I've heard the general comments about Islam and dogs - not heard the black dog and Mohammed one (mainly from chatting with kids who quite happily will sit and compare each others' religions and lives - without any of the issues any berluddy adults bring to the equation!).

I always heard it was bog standard black and white moggies that were the real hard cases to rehome though... would love a black dog cos they look soooo distinguished when they get grey hairs in their muzzle in a kind of George Clooney/Richard Gere kind of way!

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passivelyaggresive · 11/06/2011 13:59

Friends of mine tried to adopt a dog from our local dogs trust - they said they will have to do a home check, fill in a form and get a letter from their vets vouching that they had been responsible owners in the past. Which was difficult for them because they WERE the vets, but dogs trust still insisted on a vets letter Hmm. Then, a friend of a friend equired about a particular dog and were told "no, we are using him for publicity at the moment" Shock

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clam · 11/06/2011 14:01

We had a choice between a black girl puppy and a golden boy. Was a toss-up between the two insofar as they were both healthy, lively but not too much so etc.. Hadn't heard any of this superstitious stuff about colour before (although apparently lots of people won't buy green cars!?
Nothing to do with Mohammad though!) but in the end, we went for the boy as we had loads of boys' names up our sleeves and none for girls. How shallow is that? Blush
Although the breeder did say she'd had trouble getting a decent photo of the girl to send to someone. Very sweeet in the flesh, however.

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