Just heard that Dad's old JRT has just been PTS

[Ormirian]

He was 16. In poor health but not suffering so he hung on. Had kidney problems but we being treated. Mum and dad had a holiday booked and almost cancelled because they were worried he wouldn't make it - but they went and he was still here when they got home. He had a last few happy days, sniffing round the garden, being fussed by my DC when we visited. But he had a stroke and dad reluctantly took him to the vet.

So so sad.

Dad is distraught. He is 80 and in failing health himself. Mr G was the first dog that he had that wasn't a family dog - he was his and his alone as he didn't arrive until DB and I had left home. He grew up alongside all the GC and was loved by them all. He seems to associate himself with the dog in some way - I am so worried about him

He refuses to get another. I've told them I'll take the dog in if they aren't able to look after it for any reason. DH and the DC onboard with that idea too. But he won't. I think it would be the very best thing he could do

Mum called me at work and I am trying not to cry...

[Madsometimes]

I'm so sorry. Deciding you are too old to care for a dog is a very hard decision to make. I can see why your father has decided this, but it would be great if he could fix it so he had regular dog time.

[GrimmaTheNome]

I'm so sorry.

They might (in due course) want to think about fostering a dog - I think sometimes no-kill rescues will foster a dog too old for many to want to adopt with an older person

[Ormirian]

But I don't think they are too old. OK, a tiny puppy might be too much but an older dog would be fine. They have a big garden, plenty of room, dad still goes for a walk every day. I hope he changes his mind soon. I know him...he will mope and it will send him spiralling into a dark dark place

[Threadworm8]

It is hard to think of another dog so soon. Perhaps he will change his mind in time. It took me six months to come round to a new dog whn my last died.

JRTs are very special. They are so clever, so close. Sorry that oyur dad and you have lost this dog. x

[MotherJack]

I am so sorry to hear your news, Orm. It broke my heart when I had to have Oldboy pts last year. I remember the feeling of waking up and him not being there.

I can see you have worries for your dad's mental health so I could suggest a sneaky little ploy for you.... I bet there is an older dog out there with a sad story that will melt your dad's heart. Give him a couple of weeks to grieve though before you tell him the 1st story. Softly softly catchee monkee, as they say. I felt there was no way I could replace Oldboy - and of course, there was no replacing him - but the house was so empty, and the single biscuit he left in his bowl was so lonely and made me cry when I saw it.... that I fostered another 4 weeks later and when I saw her barging up the garden path I knew she wasn't leaving.

In fact, that may be an idea.... could you suggest fostering from rescue to him? That way he is not committing himself, and he won't feel he is replacing his best mate....

[Ormirian]

Thanks everyone.

motherjack - I think suggesting a foster is a very good idea. But I don't even know how to broach the subject for now.

Got to go home and tell my DC now

[MotherJack]

Leave it a while, Orm. Let him grieve...

and then, if you have time, if I were you I would contact a few local rescues and explain the situation... sound them out on his behalf and see if they have any suitable candidates. You could then approach it as though you had heard of x, y or z dog, desperately sad in kennels looking for a foster home. Just drop little seeds every now and then. I think in general that men like to think that things are their idea

[GrimmaTheNome]

Sound out your mum - if your dad is in failing health presumably she's going to have to be actively involved in the fiendish Plot To foist Foster a Dog

[MotherJack]

That's true Grimma - I missed that. And yet that has positives.... getting mum on side who can also drip feed - if fostering is suitable from the rescue's POV.

Hope your kids take it as ok as can be btw, Orm. I think goodbye ceremonies often help. Making cards and suchlike and saying goodbye to a chosen memorial spot int he garden.

[MotherJack]

lol at Foister

[Ormirian]

DS2 howled for about an hour Made me cry some more. The others were more controlled - they knew it was coming.

Dad rang earlier. Talking about something entirely different and trying to be so collected.

[GrimmaTheNome]

Oh dear, poor lad (and poor you)

[MotherJack]

Orm

It's such a horrible time

[chickchickchicken]

i feel for you all. i have a 14yr old jrt and they are indeed very special and loyal dogs. your poor dad.

i agree with everything motherjack has said

also, another option to think about is him doing some voluntary dog walking for cinnamon trust and/or papas as you said he likes a daily walk. it would get him out of the house, take his mind off things (a bit), he would meet other people (older in the case of cinnamon trust, any age with papas) as well as taking a dog for a walk that may not otherwise have a walk that day

[DogsBestFriend]

Oh Orm, I'm so very sorry. I hope that the whole family will remember the good times and the love shared and that it will help to do so.

And maybe though Dad can't think about adopting or fostrering another dog now and sharing his love and commitment, in time...

[Ormirian]

Thankyou all.

I know it won't seem as important to anyone else but i just had to PTs one of my little ratties today too

[Threadworm8]

Oh you poor thing. I bet that rats are lovely little personalities and I'm sure you will miss him/her.

[chickchickchicken]

all pets are important to a caring owner

[MotherJack]

I'm so sorry, Orm. Like Chicken said, beloved pets are beloved pets, no matter what form they take. I have heard it said that rats are like having tiny little dogs in any case. Hope you, and especially DS2 are bearing up.

[Ormirian]

Thankyou all You are so kind.

Well me sadness bore fruit. Started a renewed search for a rescue dog for us. Website for local rescue had the perfect JRT for us (we've been looking for a while). We went and he had been reserved but opposite was the most gorgeous collie-cross - 11m old, soft as butter and begging for attention. So we took him out of the kennel, walked him round and has a stroke and a cuddle. Just beautiful! I am in love. DC are obsessed. Just got to wait for the OK from the rescue and is should be all systems go.

[Madsometimes]

That is fantastic news. Do you live near your parents, because I'm sure your dog will be a great tonic for your dad.

[Ormirian]

Yes we do mad. Only 20 mins drive. Hoping it will make him happier - new beginnings not just endings.

[Madsometimes]

That is great. I'm sorry to hear about your rat. We lost our hammy on the same day that dd1 did her communion, and she still can't think of that day without feeling sad, even though it was 3 years ago.

[chickchickchicken]

orm - hope it all works out well for you. have posted on your other thread

[Ormirian]

Thanks chick!

Went to see mum and dad for the first time since JRT was PTS. They are OK - we had a chat about him and his funny little ways. Sad but funny too.

They are chuffed to bits about our news and mum straight away offered to dog-sit as often as we need them to.