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Co-sleeping discussion on This Morning

(28 Posts)
Tatties Wed 24-May-06 11:15:09

on now!

bubblerock Wed 24-May-06 11:17:08

I'm watching - hmmm, book written by a non mother, got a bit of stick from P&F didn't she?!

Tatties Wed 24-May-06 11:21:30

I only caught it half way through, yes she did get a bit of stick. Phil couldn't make the distinction between tired and exhausted though...

1234567789 Wed 24-May-06 11:28:03

I thought she was a very stupid woman talking rubbish and NOT a mum

heartinthecountry Wed 24-May-06 11:37:06

But what she is saying it based on scientific studies, not on her experience as a mother, so as she said, surely that is irrelevant?

Gloworm Wed 24-May-06 11:40:53

didnt see it...what did she say?

itiswednesday Wed 24-May-06 11:44:03

Margot believes that co-sleeping until 5 years is beneficial

Margot Sunderland is one of Britain's leading experts on children's mental health with over twenty years of experience in the subject area and twenty books under her belt. Her most recent title, 'The Science of Parenting' is proving a little more controversial, although she claims to have scientific research to back up all of her theories.

Margot is Director of Education and Training for the Centre for Child Mental Health in London. She has been a child psychotherapist with 20 years' experience of working with children and families, she runs Masters degree programmes in Arts and Child Psychotherapy and is author of more than 20 published books on child mental health. In 2002 she won an award in the Mental Health section of a BMA (British Medical Association) Book Competition.

Her extensive research into the neuroscience of parent-child interactions in recent years has resulted in The Science of Parenting. Her conclusions have been drawn from numerous studies across the USA and in the UK, Canada, Brazil, India, New Zealand, Australia, Turkey, Sweden, Switzerland, Italy, Belgium, the Netherlands, Germany, and France.

About The Book

The Science of Parenting represents a new approach to childcare. While most parenting books are based on a combination of personal opinion, received wisdom, and anecdotal evidence, The Science of Parenting represents scientific research.

Drawing on over 1000 research studies world-wide, and having taken eight years to collate, Margot reveals the true influence our parenting techniques have on a child's brain, both in the moment and for the future. She believes how we treat our children literally hardwires their brains for emotional well-being or the reverse, directly impacting on their ability to form relationships, manage anger, seek out adventures and follow their dreams.

Margots aim is not to scare parents but rather to present them with the facts, and support them in all their crucial child-rearing decisions. Margot's aim is to offer practical advice based on hard evidence. She addresses the most popular and commonly recommended child-rearing techniques, endorsing some and challenging others, all from a standpoint of how they are affecting the chemical balance and key systems in a child's brain.

heartinthecountry Wed 24-May-06 11:44:16

She says that babies will be less prone to stress in later life and are at less risk of cot-death if they co-sleep with their parents rather than being sleep trained ala GF. It's all to do with cortisol levels in the brain. Nothing really that others like Deborah Jackson haven't said before, but based on scientific studies rather than opinion.

alexsmum Wed 24-May-06 11:45:20

so what was her take on co-sleeping then?

itiswednesday Wed 24-May-06 11:46:24

She said that it was damaging to children if they do not co sleep and that they would end up with neological problems and need drink or smoking to calm themselves down as adults. Anfd that sending children to nursery would damage them as well. A really stupid woaman, my blood was boiling over

MrsMills Wed 24-May-06 11:46:30

I think she should have worn a bra though

itiswednesday Wed 24-May-06 11:58:31

I have sent an email into the show, if people want to co sleep that is their choice but to tell the non co sleepers that they are damaging their children who will then be dependant on drinking or smoking is stupid and irresponsible

oliveoil Wed 24-May-06 12:00:47

Does she have any advice on how to get dd2 out of my bed, her elbows are sharp and her nappy bum takes up too much of the bed.

Thanks.

itiswednesday Wed 24-May-06 12:01:52

No OO sorry

Bugsy2 Wed 24-May-06 12:08:55

Hmmmmm, didn't a certain contentious authoress of baby training books co-sleep with her mother until she was 10?!

heartinthecountry Wed 24-May-06 12:09:19

I'm not sure she was saying that exactly thisiswednesday - she was saying that children who experience high levels of stress when young may go on to have overactive stress systems leading to use of alcohol, drugs etc. And co-sleeping is one way of keeping stress levels low.

I think tbh she didn't really get a proper chance to put her point across as Philip kept interupting her.

itiswednesday Wed 24-May-06 12:14:18

That is just my interpretation of what she said btw I have never read any baby books from anybody as I don't believe in them
Each baby is different and every family is different

bubblerock Wed 24-May-06 12:23:34

"But what she is saying it based on scientific studies, not on her experience as a mother, so as she said, surely that is irrelevant?"

Heartinthecountry, it was the fact that she said don't co sleep if you are exhausted, and I think, If you are a mother to a baby then most of the time you are exhausted and this woman not being a Mother and not having been through interupted sleep night after night cannot possibly know how tiring it can be so it is relevant.

Chloe55 Wed 24-May-06 12:25:09

I always end up in an argument with my mum over co-sleeping. Each to their own but providing co-sleeping is carried out safely then it has been proved to be beneficial in the child's upbringing. Too many people are focusing on recent cot-deaths due to co-sleeping but these have been in the case of poor safety (over-tired/pillows/quilts/gaps in the bed etc). Co-sleeping worked for me initially whilst bf but now I have ds in his cot, purely for my benefit as I sleep better when he isn't kicking me in the ribs

heartinthecountry Wed 24-May-06 13:02:42

bubblerock - I see what you are saying. I think her being a mother or not has a bearing on how realistic her advice is to actually follow. But all she is actually doing is presenting what the scientific studies show, and basing her advice on that. (Rather than somebody like GF who is basing her advice on her own experience and opinion. Very different.)

I guess it is then down to each parent to use that information as they wish.

As for the tired/exhausted thing I personally think there is a difference. Yes as a mother to a newborn I was very tired, but I wasn't so exhausted that I couldn't respond to her when she stirred or cried.

itiswednesday Wed 24-May-06 13:04:05

Phillip was saying that the problem was that science is exact and humans are all different

melrose Wed 24-May-06 13:05:34

What was Fern's take on it?

Chloe55 Wed 24-May-06 13:07:33

I think she was against it really. Only saw the tail end of the convo though.

heartinthecountry Wed 24-May-06 13:09:39

She was less agressive than Philip but was essentially saying that she felt children needed their own place to sleep.

itiswednesday Wed 24-May-06 13:14:18

I think all families are different and so are all babies. They had some of the emails from viewers and they said it again everyone is different. Fern said she co slept with her DD1 and DD2 last night when her DH phil was away working but that her DDs would be back in own beds tonight.

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