I'm worried my niece,12, is depressed, anyone recommened anything to help?

[duke]

My Niece, 12, HATES school and her brother and her life. Sometimes it's normal teen behaviour but recently she has been getting into rages which have ended in her ripping at her wrists and actually pulling out her hair. She leaves for school and then comes home 5 mins later hysterically crying about how much she hates school. She has great friends, isn't being bullied and the teachers say she is getting on fine in classes. I have found notes that she has written about how much she hates herself and how stupid she is. I looked at a website about teen depression she ticks almost every box. I am really worried about her and her mum. We have talked and talked about it, the only thing that ever comes out of the end of the conversation is that she doesn't want to go to school.
Can anyone recommend any thing to help.
Thanks

[irises]

Her mum needs to get her to the GP sharpish and referred to the local CAMHS (children and adolescent mental health) service.

Sorry in a rush hth

[duke]

Thanks I'll tell her. She is worried about making too much fuss about it and turning it into a bigger problem.

[laweaselmys]

It is better to make a fuss and make it clear that you are listening and there to help than it is to do nothing and have things get worse under your radar.

[laweaselmys]

Is there any way you could find out from her friends what she is like from their perspective? Girls being girls, she may be more likely to ask them for help than family.

[littlelamb]

Make yourself available for her. My little brother had similar a few years ago and it was heartbreaking. I didn't meddle but made it clear I would listen and not judge. I had him down to stay with me for a few days in the school holidays which got him away from the family for a bit. He still has a few problems but nowhere near as bad as they were- he was about the same age as your dn and was displaying anorexic behaviour which was a worry to everyone. Second irises about the GP, the proper mental health referral took a bit longer than we would have liked though

[duke]

I go running with her every week and she comes to my house alot, we are close and talk alot although she finds it very hard to explain how she feels and it is hard to get her to open up. My sis has spoken to the school and they say she is a big part of the in crowd, her friends are always excited to see her and when she is with them she is the life and soul of the party. I have been with her when she has had a hysterical/tantrum episode and switched to fun time girl in a split second when she saw her friends. She goes wild when her brother so much as looks at her in the wrong way. It is taking it's toll on the rest of the family, I am so worried about my sis she has had a breakdown before and looks as though she is heading that way again.