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Do your teenagers regularly come home to an empty house?

(23 Posts)
Beetroot Fri 31-Oct-08 16:30:13

If so

What age are they?

how long are they there for?

how do they feel about it?

brimfull Fri 31-Oct-08 16:32:08

she's 16 and would love an empty house grin

robinpud Fri 31-Oct-08 16:33:49

dd is 12 and comes home to an empty house a couple of days a week. Apart from Monday, which is homework night, we try and make sure she is never on her own for more than an hour. She has the option to go to the child minders if she doesn't want to be on her own, or to bring a friend home. She is normally quite happy; texts me as soon as she is home and finds her self something to eat and to do. I thin k the darker evenings will have an impact, but normally one of us is home shortly after 4.30pm. She is very mature; and actually dislikes locking the house up in the morning more than coming in to an emtpy house.

needmorecoffee Fri 31-Oct-08 16:35:16

Nope. Am in 99% of the time ds1 and ds2 get in from school.
I used to hate it when I was a teen, especially if I'd been beaten up after school.

unknownrebelbang Fri 31-Oct-08 16:43:26

DS1, 14, does occasionally come home from school to an empty house.

He occasionally makes his own way home from karate etc to find an empty house.

Always (so far) pre-planned.

He loves being home alone, but it's less likely to happen now that DS2 is 12 and at the same school etc. He likes being home alone with his brothers, but not by himself.

I used to go home most evenings to an empty house (or with my brother) for about an hour, and it never bothered me.

MarsLady Fri 31-Oct-08 16:45:45

DS1 has never been fond of being home alone. Probably the product of a large family.

He's 15 (16 Dec), DD1 is 14 and loves being home alone.

Normally I'm there or someone else is. They seem fine with it though. As long as there's food! grin

Beetroot Fri 31-Oct-08 17:02:41

for how long Mars?
every day?

Lilymaid Fri 31-Oct-08 17:10:05

Both DSs have (Age 11 onwards) and they have never been worried about it. DS1 had around 1 hour between getting home and DH arriving back on days I was at work. DS2 often had up to 2.5 hours - but was often at a friend's house across the road.
Definitely agree that there is no problem as long as there is food.

squeakypop Fri 31-Oct-08 17:11:46

They have keys, but the house is never empty when they get home.

pointygravedogger Fri 31-Oct-08 17:20:00

dd1 comes home to an empty house and then I get home just over an hour later.

She is perfectly happy about it and doesn't want any other arrangemetn (not that there are many pther arangements on offer wink)

findtheriver Fri 31-Oct-08 18:20:39

Occasionally, but probably not as often as they'd like grin.

I know when I hit the teenage years I used to love the occasions I'd get home and have the place to myself for an hour or so. I tried to persuade my mum to work longer hours actually!

MarsLady Fri 31-Oct-08 18:35:12

sorry Beety! Had to pop out. I try to make sure that someone is there but mainly because of the DTs. If they are on their own it tends to be for a couple of hours. If I get called out to a birth it's until their father gets there. So not every day but semi regularly.

Celia2 Fri 31-Oct-08 19:02:28

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

pointygravedogger Fri 31-Oct-08 19:09:14

(dd1 is 12)

cyteen Fri 31-Oct-08 19:09:33

i used to come home to an empty house much of the time after my mum died (so age 14-17). i loved it. no atmosphere, no rows, and i could get what i wanted from the kitchen without being made to feel i'd crossed into enemy territory.

mumeeee Fri 31-Oct-08 21:48:35

DD1 used to come home to an empty house when she was 11.5, But it was only for about 20 minutes until I got home with her younger sister.
DD3 16 sometimes comes home to an empty house but there is usually DD1 ( now 21) or DD2 118 at home.

cory Fri 31-Oct-08 21:55:12

I used to love it too. Not because I didn't get on with my family- but it was so-so peaceful without them.

tigermoth Sat 01-Nov-08 06:08:27

My ds1 has been coming home to an empty house from year 6, aged 11. Not every day but averaging 2 or so days a week, depending on when my dh finishes work for the afternoon. And when dh is around, he is often upstairs sleeping (he starts work very early in the morning).

ds has had no problems with this and likes having the freedom of the kitchen. He often rings me at work around 4.00-ish for a catch up, though

I think it's important that I am contactable around the time ds finishes school - there in spirt if not in body.

georgimama Sat 01-Nov-08 06:42:39

My brothers and I came home to an empty house from the time when I was 12, as my parents had split up and my mum had to go back to work fulltime. We didn't mind, we did the chores and cooked dinner. It was good for us, some independence and meant poor mum came home to a cooked meal (although until I got to grips with boiling potatoes for an adequate period of time mash was sometimes rather lumpy!).

compo Sat 01-Nov-08 08:03:15

friends 13 year old dd (14 in Jan) has been coming home to an empty house for a couple of hours since Sept. In the half term she has been on her own the whole day while said friend is at work for at least 3 days this week.

giddykipper Sat 01-Nov-08 08:15:16

DSD (12) is home alone for about an hour and a half four days a week. She's absolutely fine about it, it's just a fact of life.

Gettingbiggernow Sat 01-Nov-08 08:28:21

I was alone from about 12 for about 1.5 hrs like giddykippers's DSD and was fine about it too - I got to watch Grange Hill, Blue Peter etc without interruption/being given chores to do unlike the weekends - heaven!! Also loved the peace and quiet and the feeling of responsibility.

One downside tho is that parents wouldn't allow a key to be hidden outside not were they happy leaving one with neighbours at the time (20 or so years on and they practically live at each others houses now!!) so when I lost/forgot my key, which was regularly, it was just tough for me - I had to sit on the doorstep until they got back, even in the freezing depths of winter: "Well you shouldn't have been so careless should you" sad that was the "downside" of being treated like an adult I guess....

Beetroot Sat 01-Nov-08 13:25:58

thanks for these insights.

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