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Anyone else had enough of their teenagers/ young adults.

(12 Posts)
Babyroobs Sun 05-Jul-20 19:26:04

I understand lock down is difficult for teenagers and young people I really do but I'm just so fed up with mine, mostly my ds1 who is not a teenager, he's almost 21. I guess I just feel like I've failed a bit as to how they've turned out.
Ds1 is normally at Uni and has been home since around the start of April. he had some course work to complete in the first couple of weeks but since then has done nothing. He has not walked the dogs, cooked a meal, emptied the dishwasher. He has mostly slept all day until 5pm at which point he goes on his Xbox with different groups of friends until maybe 4/5 am, then goes to bed again. He sometimes eats a meal with us or just buys junk food or microwaveable burgers and copious amounts of fizzy drinks. I went into his room yesterday evening and there were approximately 30 empty Lucozade bottles strewn around. Today my dh has spent all afternoon breaking up a sofa, he is severely asthmatic. I would have helped but have a bad back at the moment. Dh was breathless and exhausted, we are both working from home more hours than normal. I considered trying to wake Ds up to help but trying to wake him is awful. he is going back to his Uni town tomorrow as he has been unfurloughed from his part time job. I fear he is going to lose the job because he can't get up. He knows I just want him to go back as he is irritating me so much with his laziness. I feel awful feeling this way about him but his selfishness has just got to me this time so much. Any one else have similar problems ?

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Babyroobs Sun 05-Jul-20 19:27:20

I should also say I have tried to talk to him about whether he is depressed, and he denies he is.

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lovelyupnorth Sun 05-Jul-20 19:28:26

Ours are ace 19 and 18.

Babyroobs Sun 05-Jul-20 19:36:02

lovelyupnorth

Ours are ace 19 and 18.

My 19 year old DS is a lot better , he will walk the dog, be sociable, funny, talk to us etc.

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SauvignonBlanche Sun 05-Jul-20 19:42:29

My 19yr old DD is a nightmare, she’s been sent home from her 1st year at Uni and has moped around the house doing nothing ever since.

She doesn’t lift a finger, I’m working FT as an NHS nurse, she sleeps late then spends all day in her room on Netflix then is up to all hours.

She’s been suffering from depression and has started on ADs so life is hard for her, I get that but I’m finding her so frustrating!

Babyroobs Sun 05-Jul-20 19:47:14

SauvignonBlanche

My 19yr old DD is a nightmare, she’s been sent home from her 1st year at Uni and has moped around the house doing nothing ever since.

She doesn’t lift a finger, I’m working FT as an NHS nurse, she sleeps late then spends all day in her room on Netflix then is up to all hours.

She’s been suffering from depression and has started on ADs so life is hard for her, I get that but I’m finding her so frustrating!

Sorry to hear you are having a bad time too. It is so frustrating particularly when you are working hard and they are doing nothing. I don't even want to speak to my ds today - he got up , begrudgingly ate a small amount of roast dinner and now back in bed. It makes me fume !

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cola2019 Sun 05-Jul-20 19:48:06

My DD is 14 and has become so lazy. I worry because she was walking to and from school 30 mins each way swimming twice a week amd PE at school - all this has now gone and she literally sleeps or sits on her phone when she isn't doing school work!!! She is putting on weight but refuses to do any excercise. I've asked her if she feels ok mentally and she says never better as she actually doesn't have to leave the house for anything. All her social life is on her phone!!!!!

Babyroobs Sun 05-Jul-20 19:50:52

cola2019

My DD is 14 and has become so lazy. I worry because she was walking to and from school 30 mins each way swimming twice a week amd PE at school - all this has now gone and she literally sleeps or sits on her phone when she isn't doing school work!!! She is putting on weight but refuses to do any excercise. I've asked her if she feels ok mentally and she says never better as she actually doesn't have to leave the house for anything. All her social life is on her phone!!!!!

Yes it's hard to even get my 15yr old to go for a walk with me. Her football training was meant to start up again this week but now cancelled as our town is back in lockdown.

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Feellikedancingyeah Mon 06-Jul-20 13:57:49

Yes our DS just turned 14. He announced he was going for a run last night. Gone an hour. I went to local beauty spot, put myself at risk looking for him. Got drenched in rain and wind. Then my phone rang. He had ran 2.5 miles to a friend's house! They were shocked to see him standing there. I had to get a taxi and fetch him. He stink and reused to shower. Then spent two hours trying to argue with us. This morning he still has not showered 🤢 his anger and attitude also stinks

Nicetoolshed Mon 06-Jul-20 14:05:27

I don't know how you can stand it OP. My late teenaged DD has spent most of lockdown with friends (so part of their household from the start of lockdown). And has had a pretty good time. I was happy with that, as she behaves so much better with friends than she does at home, and months of moping around here would have been very tough and negative for everyone, realistically.
To be honest, in your situation I would probably have sent DS back to his own place and pointed him in the direction of care home and supermarket jobs.

WhatHaveIFound Mon 06-Jul-20 14:08:20

My 18 year old DD is finally a joy to be with after 3 years of hell.

DS (15) on the other hand rarely engages with us though he was finally persuaded to go for a run yesterday afternoon. It poured down so he arrived home wet & smelly and although he does shower when we tell him to, it's just that i still have to tell him!

They can both be presuded to help with chores around the home and cooking meals so i guess they're not too bad.

Babyroobs Mon 06-Jul-20 15:02:12

Nicetoolshed

I don't know how you can stand it OP. My late teenaged DD has spent most of lockdown with friends (so part of their household from the start of lockdown). And has had a pretty good time. I was happy with that, as she behaves so much better with friends than she does at home, and months of moping around here would have been very tough and negative for everyone, realistically.
To be honest, in your situation I would probably have sent DS back to his own place and pointed him in the direction of care home and supermarket jobs.

He has gone back to his Uni town/ house today and it feels like a relief ! Airing his room now as it stinks. It has been difficult for him to get a job whilst home as Dh is shielding and we wanted to be as careful as possible.

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