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Teenagers

Is my DS 17 ready to drive?

3 replies

Manaworm · 13/03/2020 18:37

DS, 17, is taking driving lessons and not doing well. He has ASD which results in him being uncoordinated and heavy footed. He has bad eyesight in one eye even wearing glasses. He has behaviour issues, and barely goes to school, refuses to get a job, often stays up all night and sleeps all day despite me trying to wake him up.
I find it stressful giving him lessons myself, as the weekly lessons with the instructor are not enough and they are saying he needs more lessons.
I often have to remind him to take a short lesson in my car with me, he is very inactive. Usually after about 20 minutes I can't take any more stress of him driving my car ( I have anxiety and hypertension myself!)
I am a single parent and have no one else to take him. His dad was pushing for lessons, but he had no involvement otherwise...
Is he actually ready to drive? I just don't think he has the maturity? Is he ready to borrow my car when he won't even do his schoolwork? Am I being too soft?

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Damia · 13/03/2020 21:24

Driving lessons are earned not a right. He either goes to school to earn them or gets a job. He cant do neither or he gets nothing. Otherwise he'll be like that his whole life, sponging off you and doing nothing in return. If he wants something he does something to earn it.

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Pentium85 · 13/03/2020 21:25

Ummm, if he can’t be bothered to do anything else, why are you assisting him to get what is a privilege?

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LynetteScavo · 13/03/2020 21:37

No school, no driving lessons.

Why are you paying for them? I had to pay for my own (my parents could easily have afforded to pay) and my own DC receive them as 17th birthday present (not unlimited!)

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