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Curfew for 16YO girl

(16 Posts)
chocolatesaltyballs22 Sun 19-Jan-20 15:23:32

Daughter was at a party last night in the next village from us (15 mins by car). She went with a friend who was starting at our house. I told her she needed to be in an Uber by 12 and she thought this was too early. What time do your 16 year olds have to be in by on a weekend?

OP’s posts: |
Jesz Sun 19-Jan-20 15:45:54

If she was at a party, I would say that you need to tailor curfew to the event, however on a regular weekend curfew would be about 11-12.

mcmen05 Sun 19-Jan-20 21:27:18

A party is different whether it's a house party or at a venue.
My dd 16 was at one last weekend in a venue and Dh collected her at 2pm
They like to go for food after party and if they have a bf like they want to have a bit off time together but a normal weekend Friday or Saturday 11pm is the latest

JohnVirgo Sun 19-Jan-20 21:34:18

Mine never had a curfew at that age. If they went to a party I let them stay until they chose to come home or the party hit a natural end. If they went to friends or the cinema etc they were usually fine by 11 so I didn't need to give a curfew.

chocolatesaltyballs22 Sun 19-Jan-20 21:36:01

Feel like I'm being too strict now but I can't sleep until she's home.

OP’s posts: |
itsgettingweird Sun 19-Jan-20 21:44:04

We didn't use Uber in my day! I lived in village one side of school and friends the other side in town.
If I wanted a lift home it was 11pm usually. If I stayed out parents didn't ask as all friends lived within 2 minutes walk on a circular estate with cul de sacs.

I accepted I had to go earlier than my friends. It never cause people any issues.

Herpesfreesince03 Sun 19-Jan-20 21:46:06

I think your times about right seeing as she was coming home in an uber late at night

Gogolego Sun 19-Jan-20 21:50:00

I think house parties are one of those things were only the attender knows when to leave not the attenders dp
Knowing when to leave can only be learnt by making mistakes first. And the younger that age is the better

The fact that the venue was only 15 mins away means it's the perfect place for such a lesson to be learnt

midwintermorning Mon 20-Jan-20 09:04:18

Is she Year 11 or 12 - if she’s 11 - your curfew is fine, maybe extend it a bit if she’s in a Year 12 but around here the parties stop at 12.

chocolatesaltyballs22 Mon 20-Jan-20 09:23:03

She's year 12 (first year of A levels).

OP’s posts: |
midwintermorning Mon 20-Jan-20 10:30:09

I give mine more freedom gradually - it's easier that way but it's a hard process, letting go and trying not to worry but it has to be done. I make dd share an Uber - she never travels in them alone.

chocolatesaltyballs22 Mon 20-Jan-20 10:57:00

She travels in Ubers alone back from her part time job which is only 5 mins in a taxi, shares her ride with me so I'm not concerned about that. I just don't really like her being out after midnight if I'm honest.

OP’s posts: |
midwintermorning Mon 20-Jan-20 11:40:18

I just don't really like her being out after midnight if I'm honest. My 16 year olds would challenge the rationality of that...and just because I don't like it doesn't work with them - I can see their point...if they were at a party.

ReallyLilyReally Mon 20-Jan-20 20:07:24

Once I started A Levels and had a job, i didn't have a curfew. Just had to tell my parents exactly where i was, always pick up my phone/text back and never EVER get in a car with anyone who'd been drinking.

My dad didn't sleep well unless i was home, so i had to stick my head round the door when i got back

Patch23042 Wed 29-Jan-20 22:51:04

No curfew at 16 but i expect to know where they are and that they understand how to be safe. I expect not to be ignored if I text. Their friends’ parents take the same view. My parents took this approach with me, also (minus the text bit, because it was the late 1980s)grin.

So, sometimes a party will end at 11.30, sometimes at 1. Either is fine, as long as I’m in the loop and they have a lift or a taxi.

Mumofducklings Thu 30-Jan-20 15:24:09

I thought 2 was the latest my dd should be out at 16 at a party so used to say 1. They always try to push it so always agreed n 1.30. Win win. Would always Make sure that Me or friends mum was collecting

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