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16 yr old DD - what activity to boost her confidence

(11 Posts)
TeenMum123 Sat 21-Dec-19 19:17:46

This is my first post - so apologies in advance if i am posting in the wrong place.

My DD just turned 16 yrs old and apart from trying to do couch to 5K at home she doesn't do any other physical activities/classes. When we talk about, it always comes back to: i will be so rubbish and everyone else will be better than me. I try to explain that she just needs to start and it will be fine but she won't hear of it.

What can i do to help her? I thought of perhaps taking her to zumba or aerobics where its not competitive - but i would like her to join something that is social and team work based too. Perhaps i just need to back off and let her choose and go for it. Am kicking myself now thinking i should have got her in to something when she was 5 yrs old - but i cant turn back the time. She did go to ballet, tap and jazz as a child and loved it. then had a break and now wont go back as "she will be so rubbish". :|

Please let me know what you think is the best way forward.

This is to help her get fit as well as to build up her confidence.

OP’s posts: |
Bayleaf25 Sun 22-Dec-19 12:46:23

Would she enjoy a theatre group? They would probably do some dance as part of it. Not all kids have to have big speaking parts in plays but they are often a lot of fun. My 14yo DD isn’t a dancer or singer but loves the drama group.

Otherwise what about something like netball or depending on where you live/budget something totally different like rowing or riding?

If it helps it is a difficult age, my 16yo DS doesn’t do anything fitness related apart from a bit at sixth form and a very occasional visit to the boxing gym if his mates are going.

Babdoc Sun 22-Dec-19 16:05:27

Martial arts are great for confidence building. With the bonus that your DD can then defend herself if attacked while out socially. My own DD did Krav Maga and loved it.

dementedma Sun 22-Dec-19 16:10:44

Cadets is great for team work and building confidence, and they do lots of fun activities. They come from all sorts of backgrounds and are all shapes and sizes

TeenMum123 Sun 22-Dec-19 18:22:12

Thank you Bayleaf, Babdoc and dementedma. She was hoping to join cadets at school and they stopped it just when it was time for her to join! She loves dancing and singing but not drama which is very weird. but i can definitely ask again and see what she says. Martial arts sounds very good. i will check what we have locally and see if they have a beginners class for her age group. Thank you for responding so quickly!

OP’s posts: |
RedskyAtnight Sun 22-Dec-19 18:27:53

My very unsporty DD will happily come to the gym with me (we go to a very small, quiet one). She can do her own thing at her own pace, and she is seeing her fitness improve almost without her trying.

Lara53 Sun 22-Dec-19 20:16:07

Explorer Scouts from 14

PlanDeRaccordement Sun 22-Dec-19 20:21:53

if she likes dancing, sign her up for adult type of dancing like ball room or belly dance - American Tribal Style is a collaborative form. Then everyone around her age will all be beginners too.

Rudolphiana Sun 22-Dec-19 20:42:56

Swimming
Saturday job
Volunteering
St John Ambulance
Learn guitar
Book group

Jeeves93 Sun 22-Dec-19 22:43:57

Most large (and many small) towns have a cadet unit of some sort, it doesn't have to be school based.

willowmelangell Sun 22-Dec-19 22:59:55

Volunteering has worked wonders for my ASD dd. 2-3 hours on a Saturday in a charity shop.

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