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allowance/pocket money for a 13 yr old

(13 Posts)
citcatgirl45 Sun 13-Oct-19 09:43:42

I was just wondering how much pocket money/allowance people give their teens. We give my 13 yr old DD £30 a month BUT she needs to buy everything from that except school uniform, school equipment, basic clothes and toiletries. In my opinion it is the best thing we have done for her she has learnt the value of money and is so savvy with what she spends, no 1000's of lipsticks or novelty socks anymore!!! I used to just give her money when she went out with her friends and she would end up spending the lot on crap. It also meant I always had to have cash available to give her. We now just transfer the money across on the first of every month. I can see what she spends on contactless as have the app on my phone.

The problem we have though is she is now being bullied for being rich because she is reluctant to spend it now as is her money not mine all her mates always ask her for money she doesn't give it but they are calling her "the rich bitch".

It has really been the best thing for her and she has so much money saved now for some new trainers but it is affecting her friendships. Other parents think I am mad!!! If it works for us isn't that ok!!

OP’s posts: |
Hellohah Sun 13-Oct-19 09:47:36

DS gets £10/week. Agree its the best thing for him as he pays for everything himself, decides when he's going out etc.
Your DD needs new friends.
DS has never been asked for money, he has offered when a friend didn't have enough once and bought another friend a drink when he forgot his wallet, but they'd never demand money from him.

Ohmydaysmate Sun 13-Oct-19 09:57:17

Do they do jobs for that? I only ask because my DS 13 has a small list (7items) to do everyday to earn pocket money and I battle daily with him to do 1 thing! They are nothing taxing, empty your lunch box, put shoes on the rack lay the table little things like that. He not earned a penny yet it’s been going on for a few months. I don’t know if I should just give up on the jobs list and give him pocket money anyway as we are getting nowhere he’s stuck in because he has no money at the moment I won’t give him any because he does sod all and I’m moaning at him all the time for not doing his jobs. Have tried ignoring the fact he does nothing and that doesn’t work either.

mamaduckbone Wed 16-Oct-19 20:37:41

Ds13 gets £20 a month from us although half of that is dependent on attitude at school (not getting detentions / behaviour points) and earns £9 a week doing a paper round 3 days a week.

We pay for basics - (cheap) phone contract, essential clothes, toiletries etc- but he has to cover money for going out, non-essential clothes, PS4 games etc.

He has saved his paper round money to buy a new speaker for his bedroom which I'm quite impressed at, and spends less on crap when he goes out now he's earning it himself.

reluctantbrit Thu 17-Oct-19 08:35:12

DD is 12 and gets £25/months but £5 goes to her saving account to stay for buying gifts for school friends, leaving £20 for all she deems essential.

It seems it is a lot as others don't get that much but she said others get money when they go out so in the end it must be roughly the same.

We give DD only extra cash if she is out over lunch as I don't expect her to pay for a normal meal. Coffee shops is hers to pay.

Not related to jobs, all household chores are done by all of us.

Purplejay Tue 05-Nov-19 10:56:38

My DS 13 gets £70 per month. This is made up of £50 for clothes and £20 for pocket money. I have only been doing this since Sept and he hasn’t spent any of his clothing money yet (he has to keep this separate). I bought him quite a lot of clothes at the start of the summer and will buy his pe kit. He doesn’t have school uniform.

He doesn’t really do jobs other than tidy his room, pick up his clothes but I think he should. I need to have another crack at it.

Mrsdavidson Tue 05-Nov-19 18:10:08

We give my dd13 £10 a week, paid directly into her bank account. We pay for her phone contract (£10pm) and travel separately but this is to pay for lunches (if she doesn't want a packed lunch) and going out with her friends as well as makeup and clothes if she decides she wants rather than needs something. I think it does give them independence but my dd has managed to save over £200, which she says she hates having for similar reasons to you, her friends think she's 'loaded', and she has drawn the short straw a few times when she's gone out for something to eat with friends, she's paid more than her fair share and another friend borrowed £5 off her and doesn't see the need to pay it back. I've said we'll open a junior savings account for her and she can put as much as she wants in it then just keep a small amount in her day-to-day account if it makes her feel better. She does very little in the chores department unless asked, but that's my fault, not hers, i'd do the same if I could get away with it! 😂

SallyAnne89 Tue 05-Nov-19 18:32:34

I got about that 20 years ago. I do not think it's that much.

RedskyToNight Tue 05-Nov-19 18:35:37

DD (13) also gets £30 a month which is for non standard clothes and toiletries, for going out and presents. It feels about the right amount and she is happy with it anyway.
We don't link it to jobs - we have a certain number of jobs that the DC are expected to do as part of living in this house, and we wouldn't want them to think that they are optional.

shiningstar2 Tue 05-Nov-19 18:58:03

My grandson is 14. He gets £5 a week from parents and £5 a week from grandparents. He actually gets £4 of grandparent's pocket money paid into a small account with his parent's £5. He has control of this account. The other £1 is saved up for him by us and returned to him for use in the long summer holiday. Changed into Euros if they are going abroad or used for days out with friends cinema visits ext if they are staying at home. This also helps out his parents as extra pocket money is always needed at this age in long holidays. He doesn't have to buy any essentials or any clothes out of this. It is his enjoyment money. He does save up out of it for tech games he wants.

shiningstar2 Tue 05-Nov-19 19:02:36

He has just got his first job delivering papers on Sundays and this provides a bit extra. He is far more sensible with money since he got regular pocket money rather than just asking for it for cinema/macdonalds/badminton ext when his mates are going out. He thinks now about where he really wants to go. I will subsidise sports things a bit if he's short but not macdonalds, that has to come out of his pocket money grin

Whathappenedtothelego Tue 05-Nov-19 19:04:18

My 12 year old gets £10 a month. I pay for her clothes still.
I also put £10 every other month on her phone (she has a PAYG sim which won't let you top up less than £10.). I check her phone balance at the end of every month, and match how much credit is left, which I give to her in cash (or how much is left over £5 if we just topped up that month) - she usually ends up with an extra £3 or so a month from that.

Taswama Fri 08-Nov-19 07:10:33

My 12 yr old gets £12 per month. I pay for phone and clothes so it’s really just for sweets etc. I transfer £8 into his bank account and give him £4 in cash. He’s not yet going out on his own or with mates, I will review if/when this starts happening.

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