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How much freedom to give your ‘tweens and ideas of things to do in the hols.

(6 Posts)
adonemumofthree Mon 05-Aug-19 14:01:50

My eldest dd is 12 and a half and due to us living rurally find that she spends a lot of time not doing very much.

We obviously do make an effort trying to organise trips to the cinema, swimming pool etc but it’s not something we are able to do for her every day mainly down to cost.

She would really like to go and hang out with her friends in the big park in our nearest town, where a lot of her friends are from but I’m just not sure I’m happy with her not having something structured to do and feel sometimes that’s when trouble starts (drinking, smoking etc) and I also remember be pretty pissed off at teenagers hanging about parks, swearing and being inappropriate when my DC were little.

She is my 1st born though and I am aware that I’m probably being a little over protective.

Wondered firstly how much freedom everybody else’s 11-14 year olds have and if it’s normal to just go and let her hang out somewhere with her friends but also how do you fill their days during the hols without having sell a body organ...

Please help me out with ideas, activities, visits that won’t break the bank but that also aren’t “cringe” 😬😬😭

OP’s posts: |
OrangeJustice Mon 05-Aug-19 14:24:56

Ds is the same age and spends his time hanging out with friends at the village park, watching youtube, playing Fortnite online with friends and lurking about being bored. He also mows the lawns, empties the bins, helps with grocery shopping when we go, helps his granny with her shopping and odd jobs, any odds and ends I need him to do. He’s swims once a week anyway but we usually go more often in the holidays. Other outings include cinema and trampoline park (with me and dd). He’s happy to do walks and picnics but only really if dh comes to so I’ve given up on that during the week!

I’d be happy for him to hang out aimlessly with his friends in our village but would feel much the same as you if he wanted to go into town or the park in town to do the same. I’d know if there was anything untoward going on locally pretty sharpish via fb busybodies anyway.

adonemumofthree Mon 05-Aug-19 19:52:33

Yes unfortunately my daughter doesn’t have any friends who stay close to us so everything is a bus/drive away...

We love where we live but it’s definitely not quite as high action as she’s like!!

OP’s posts: |
bigchris Mon 05-Aug-19 19:58:44

My dd is 12

She's been baking with me, writing comics , but also sleepovers, swimming, shopping with friends, lots of you tube, Instagram, snapchatting friends

mcmen71 Mon 05-Aug-19 21:18:13

My dd14 I let her go to down to meet friends once a fortnight as it so dangerous with underage drinking no later than 7 PM as shops all close then and afraid of mischief
I have older dd 16 girls out probably 4 times as week

Lara53 Mon 12-Aug-19 19:21:46

DS2 is 12 (13 in 3 weeks). Summer hols started for him 6th July. He had a week mooching at home as I was still working. This was broken up by 2 days spent at mates for the day. We went away for a week holiday. We then spent a couple of quiet weeks - DS went into town by train to meet friends and get milkshakes/ ice cream a couple of times and had friends over for the day plus two sleepovers. This week he is on Scout camp. The last couple of weeks will be spent pottering and getting ready for school as most friends are now away. We may do a day in London with family friends. There has been lots of online gaming/ Chat with best friend who lives 4 hours away - they also visited over night.

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