Home alone

[Rosie40]

What is a reasonable time for 13 and 12 year old ds's to be left on their own in house? My H thinks they will be fine tomorrow while we are at work (8.45-5) if we leave them a sandwich for lunch? They are sensible and will probs just play on PS4 or go out on their bikes but I think it's too long?

[Birdie6]

My DD 13 and DS 10 are often alone - as long as they are sensible and can contact you, there shouldn't be a problem. Mine make their own sandwiches too.

[Decormad38]

We leave dd 13. We were both at work last week. I got home 5 ish and she had only been awake since 12!

[rookiemere]

Yes fine. DS was on his own from 8-5 one day last week with the dog for company. I wouldn't leave him for the full week, but a couple of days like that is fine.

[caughtinanet]

It must be the day for questions about home alone children, Ive just posted on a similar thread.

I would leave them but wouldn't make them any food, at that age I'd expect them to be able to make their own lunch, is there a reason they can't do that?

[Rosie40]

Only because of the mess they'd make by making their own haha . They are left for a few hours after school and half days in hols and I'm always with my phone so I'm sure they will be fine really.
Thanks for replies

[JustDanceAddict]

I first left DD for whole day at 13, but not DS who was just 12 then, at same time. Mainly to do with arguments, tbh. Fine for an hour after school but only just. Think they were 13 and 15 for totally home alone in school hols, so Years 8 & 10.

[Seeline]

I think it's often easier to leave a single 12/13yo alone rather than leaving two closely aged siblings together. Will they argue or fit over who gets to watch what or play what? Or do they get on well with each other?
Mine have a nearly 3 year gap, but even then I never leave the older to 'look after' the younger. I think it's too much responsibility for a child, and also the older would take advantage and spend hte whole time demanding the younger does everything required and anything else that can be thought of!

[Seeline]

*fight not fit!

[ohmywhattodo]

What’s the alternative? If you have to work, you have to work? I would be ok with leaving them but not them going out on their bikes. As long as they’ve got your number and you can always react if there was an emergency. It is quite a long time though to be just with each other.

[Supersoaker10]

Yeah I do have to work unfortunately. I have Thursday and Friday off. They could go to their grandparents which they are doing on Wednesday all day but they are at the age where they don't want to be there all time. Ds1 has gone swimming and ds2 is out with his friends. I'm in constant contact with them so they aren't together just them all day but they are quite close and don't really argue so I'm not concerned about them fighting thankfully !

[BackforGood]

Not sure why they aren't getting their own lunch, but age wise they should be fine.
At that age, mine had the potential to fight, but if yours get on well enough, then they are old enough.

All sorts of factors come in to this though - like how far away you (both) are. How contactable you are. If you could leave if there were a problem. What your neighbours and your relationship is like with them. Personalities of the dc - I left dc2 on their own for longer and more frequently and with FAR more confidence that I ever left dc1, as dc1 is impulsive and forgetful, whereas dc2 is far more measured and calm.

[Malibucyprus]

My DD's are 14 & 11 and they're left alone 4 days of the week from 8.30am - 3.30pm during school holidays, we've been doing this for a year now, and there's never been an incident (touch wood).

They usually sleep till after 9am, then doss around in their pj's, sandwiches are in the fridge although they're capable of making their own, but if there aren't any made up, they'll likely just eat crisps and chocolate all day.

Instructions are as follows:
Don't answer the door to anyone.
No lighting candles.
No using the oven/hob/toaster.
No fighting.
Don't have every bloody light on in the house like you usually do during the day!!

[Oblomov19]

Seems fine to me. Most of MN disagrees!

[Supersoaker10]

DS's are sensible and trustworthy and know to answer phone/text straight away to me but with the lunch thing......they are going through that 'no commen sense' phase and a simple sandwich making would turn into 50 phone calls to me asking where is, what shall I, how do you and a bloody mess to walk into when I get home. So it's just easier to do it myself in morning. And like PP said, they'd just fill up on crisps, biscuits and sweets rather than be bothered to attempt lunch! They are at there GP's today so I can get on with work at work knowing they are fed and ok.