16 year old depressed, refusing to go to college, suicidal

[567hhh]

Hi there,

I am really struggling at the moment with my teenage daughter and would really appreciate any advice anyone can give. She has been suffering with depression over the last couple of years, and has gone so far to put herself in hospital by trying to end her own life (took an overdose, but then alerted me in time so we could get to the hospital).

She has tried various different types of therapy, we've talked to cahms, the GP, her school etc. but nothing is seeming to work. She is currently on anti-depressants, but sees no point in anything. She is now refusing to go to college and has been self-harming very badly all over her arms, all the doctors are at a loss what to do with her apart from watch her 24/7 which is impossible when you have a full time job and are the only dependent for her.

I am really at a loss for what to do as I cannot continue not going into work to stay at home with her and I also need her to know that this cannot continue her staying at home without education / a job. She still sees her friends when she wants too, although this has reduced recently. I have threatened that she will have to leave the house if she does not go to college, but at this moment it is too much of a risk to kick her out as I think she would do something.

Please if anyone has any advice for this situation i'd be very grateful, I really have no idea how to deal with this anymore

Thank you

[Blessthekids]

💐
I have no solid advice but wanted to give this a bump and see if anyone else has some words of wisdom. I would keep returning to your GP and maybe even social services to organise some respite for yourself though.

[JiltedJohnsJulie]

Sorry, I have no advice either but I don't think that threatening to kick her out will turn things around unfortunately.

Have you spoken to Family Lives? They might be able to help and this book is supposed to be good too.

Does the college know what's going on?

[MayhemandMadness01]

Alot of colleges have counsellors on site - might be worth while exploring what support college can offer.

Does she have any interests /hobbies? If not, then see if there is anything she would like to try - some clubs will loan equipment, give free try it sessions if money is tight.

[MidLifeCrisis2017]

Went through this with my DD for seven years.

I found CAMHS, GP and school and college counselling to be a waste of time. Young Minds charity was excellent but I finally paid for a private consultation at the Priory, £400, to get guidance on the best form of counselling and anti depressants for her. We're through the worst but it was hell. Best of luck and look after yourself too.

[CanIGetaRefund]

I have been through similar with my DC and I was advised to take all the pressure off in terms of pushing college/education/work. If your daughter wants to attend college, fine. But she may need some time off to rest and recover. She needs your permission to be kind to herself. I also struggle with this but I now feel it is the right advice because my DC has recovered and this is all that matters. It sounds like your daughter needs a medication review as well, because she is still having symtoms. It may be that she needs a different dose or medication. Getting some therapy for yourself could be very helpful, to help you through this.