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What kind of help do I need for my son

(17 Posts)
Giojo Fri 14-Dec-18 15:16:02

My son is 16 next month, he has quite a lot of different challenges, but at his parents evening all his teachers said he has got it in him to achieve way more but as soon as he comes across a problem, as soon as he doesn't understand something or if he thinks that people believe he will fail he just gives in, switches off and there's no 'turning him back on again'
I was thinking of private tuition, but after last night's parents evening I think he would benefit more from some kind of therapy, something that can get under the surface and find out why he buckles before even trying, some one who will be able to build him up and give him the confidence to hit things head on, I don't expect A* from him, I just want him to gain the confidence to achieve to the best of his own ability.

So who do I turn to???

JiltedJohnsJulie Sat 15-Dec-18 09:08:42

Do you think there’s a chance it could be adhd?

redcaryellowcar Sat 15-Dec-18 09:20:15

It sounds like a confidence issue to me, can you get him climbing mountains doing high ropes courses, out cycling, I think physical activity is often really important and achieving things you thought were hard eg making it up a climbing wall, or managing an abseil lowly brings confidence on. Doesn't need to be competitive, but persona achievements and fresh air might work well for him. You might find a D of E group which would be a nice social thing for him to do and it doesn't have to be sport eg he could do cooking as one of his 'learning a new skill' things?

Giojo Sat 15-Dec-18 11:09:19

Hi thanks for your reply, what's D of E? I agree with what your saying but I'm wondering if he will be able to process that achievement into school work or general tasks at home etc

JiltedJohnsJulie Sat 15-Dec-18 18:20:03

DofE is the Duke of Edinburgh Award.

What’s he doing when he switches off in the classroom?

Giojo Sun 16-Dec-18 13:51:50

Ah ok, he's not really interested in activities to be honest,
When he switches off he just zones out, day dreams or fiddles with stuff, chats to his mates.... Wastes time until his lesson is over

JiltedJohnsJulie Sun 16-Dec-18 17:35:39

If he’s doing that, I still think it’s worth exploring adhd.

JiltedJohnsJulie Sun 16-Dec-18 17:39:22

Have a read of this on inattentive adhd smile

Giojo Sun 16-Dec-18 18:14:24

He has got NVLD, none verbal learning difficulties, which is under the asbergers umbrella, plus dyslexia, dysgraphia and dyscalcolia, I will read that link though, thank you

JiltedJohnsJulie Sun 16-Dec-18 21:21:25

It’s interesting that you say that. My DFs DS has Aspergers and has recently been diagnosed with ADHD at the age of 21 after struggling in Uni.

Giojo Sun 16-Dec-18 21:43:15

I read through it, and I'm blown away!!!! He ticks every box on the list...... I will discuss it with his key worker this week

Thank you so much

JiltedJohnsJulie Mon 17-Dec-18 07:58:49

He might find this YouTube channel helpful too thanks

Giojo Mon 17-Dec-18 08:13:19

Thank you, thanks for taking the time to reply etc x

BeRightOnMum Mon 17-Dec-18 13:50:10

My son is the same age and exactly the same. I’ve been asking the school to assess him for years and they haven’t. My GP says the school has to assess him. Does anyone know how I can get him diagnosed?

Giojo Mon 17-Dec-18 14:36:02

I have just emailed his support worker at school today, she agreed he needed assessing, by the time I had replied she had emailed again to say the ref feral was done and to wait for an appt with CAHMS

I am not sure but if you look on CAHMS website you may be able to self refer, but is always better to get the school on board first x

JiltedJohnsJulie Mon 17-Dec-18 15:51:54

@BeRightOnMum I’d ask on the SN Chat Board to find the best way to get a diagnosis and how that diagnosis can help smile

Giojo Mon 17-Dec-18 16:15:42

I hope you get the answers you need

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