daughters friend watches vile videos

[ptaylor194]

my 15 year old daughters friend has very strange moods and some anger issues, my daughter has said she no longer wants to be her friend and when I asked why, she said her friend watches horrible videos of people dying and not just in horror films, real life deaths, such as beheadings, and she seems to enjoy them, I don't know how she finds such things on the internet, my daughter is very concerned that this is affecting her mind and causing her anger issues. I feel the need to tell her mother, we get on well, but very frightened of repercussions from the friend against my daughter, and her mom may well just tell me to mind my own business, any advice would be appreciated.
thank you

[Iluvthe80s]

Sounds like your daughter is very sensible. If my child were doing that I would personally want to know. As you know the mum I would be inclined to tell her. Others may have a different view. Good luck

[Iluvthe80s]

If the mum tells you to mind your own business then to my mind that would be very silly. You are trying to help her.

[ChickenDinnerChecky]

Can you call the school instead? I've done this several times when dd15 has told me worrying things about her friends (abuse, suicidal thoughts etc).

[SquirmOfEels]

Do they go to the same school?

[ptaylor194]

yes, they go to same school, I drive them to and from school everyday, the atmosphere getting quite unpleasant.

[SquirmOfEels]

In that case, I recommend telling a teacher. Live beheading videos are typically posted by extremist groups who may well be looking to groom online. That makes it a safeguarding issue (as well as a counter radicalisation issue) and teachers are trained in what to do about this.

And perhaps filling your DD's diary with family events for a little while, so the friendship can naturally dwindle - or not, of course, if the gory fascination proves to be just a brief fad not a settled interest.

[Hidingtonothing]

Yep I would take it to safeguarding at the school, explain what your DD told you and ask that her/your name be kept out of it. It's likely other people know about the videos too so it won't necessarily be obvious where the info came from which hopefully will avoid any repercussions for DD.

I would keep a really open dialogue with DD about this friendship too, especially as it sounds like you drive this girl to school. Is that something you could stop doing if the friendship with DD is beginning to break down?

[Friedgreen]

Beheading videos are illegal. You can contact the police to file a complaint - they’ll probably pay a visit.