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17 year old DD phone restrictions

(239 Posts)
marionemread Wed 27-Dec-17 23:33:28

For the past few years I've taken all electronic devices off my 17 year old daughter at 9:30pm and her WiFi goes off completely at 9:30pm. This is the same for weekends and during the holidays. This results in constant arguments and her attitude has worsened including her swearing and arguing with me and being very reluctant to give her phone over. Am I being too strict?

Theresnonamesleft Wed 27-Dec-17 23:36:54

Yes. She will be an adult soon and you are treating her like a small child

Sparklingbrook Wed 27-Dec-17 23:37:57

Yes. She is too old for those sort of restrictions.

ThroughThickAndThin01 Wed 27-Dec-17 23:38:09

Yes too strict. She needs to manage her own time.

Fishfingersandwichnocheese Wed 27-Dec-17 23:38:16

Yes. I cannot imagine my mum trying to pull that with me at 17.

But then I didn’t live at home and I worked so I suppose it was different.

But seriously do you intend on letting her grow up ? Because if she can’t work out when to go to sleep at 17 she’s not going to be able to is she ?

I actually can’t belive you do it on holidays and on weekends too. She can’t even watch a film in bed until 10 - that’s crazy.

Sparklesdontshine Wed 27-Dec-17 23:38:55

Absolutely ridiculous!! She's not a baby!

DailyMailDontStealMyThread Wed 27-Dec-17 23:39:56

Why don’t you trust her?

Tinselistacky Wed 27-Dec-17 23:40:00

I had my own flat at 17!!

furryelephant Wed 27-Dec-17 23:40:50

I think you’re going the right way to losing any hope of a relationship with your DD when she is an adult to be honest. Trust and respect goes both ways.

Fishfingersandwichnocheese Wed 27-Dec-17 23:41:22

It’s actually really controlling. A bit odd too.

Sparklingbrook Wed 27-Dec-17 23:42:11

Is she at school or college? What are her plans for the future?

DramaAlpaca Wed 27-Dec-17 23:44:29

As everyone else has said, she's too old to have restrictions placed on her like that. And if you want to have a good relationship with her as an adult you need to loosen the apron strings now.

Snowman41 Wed 27-Dec-17 23:44:45

Why do you do that?

BackforGood Wed 27-Dec-17 23:45:59

Yes, too strict, IMO.
Next year she will quite possibly be living in a completely different part of the country and you won't see her for 3 months at a stretch. You need to give her chance to learn to regulate herself - bedtimes, phone use, etc., long before that or she is likely to sink at University having no-one inflicting boundaries on her for the first time.

RicottaPancakes Wed 27-Dec-17 23:47:41

I think it's fine.

princesssparkle1 Wed 27-Dec-17 23:50:46

Wow. That's some draconian mothering youre doing there 😳😡

Sparklingbrook Wed 27-Dec-17 23:52:35

Why is 9.30pm the optimum time?

marionemread Wed 27-Dec-17 23:53:05

She's currently in her last year of school and off to uni a fair way away next year. I don't trust that she'll go to sleep and not stay on it all night. Causes many arguments especially on weekends and during the holidays. Weekdays she is ok with handing it over but complains she can't listen to music or talk to her friends.

supermodel Wed 27-Dec-17 23:53:53

I think this is too strict and you should allow her more freedom.

marionemread Wed 27-Dec-17 23:54:10

9:30pm is the time we go into our room so we take it off her when we go upstairs. This is the same time for my 16 yr old DS and 12 yr old DS.

RicottaPancakes Wed 27-Dec-17 23:54:42

Hopefully this is teaching her good habits.

Sparklingbrook Wed 27-Dec-17 23:54:48

How do you plan to police phone usage when she's at University? 9.30pm is very very early.

Snowman41 Wed 27-Dec-17 23:55:45

She is off to Uni in a few months but you don't trust her with her mobile phone after 9.30pm confused

Fishfingersandwichnocheese Wed 27-Dec-17 23:56:18

Honestly I think it’s ridiculous.
If she stays on it an doesn’t sleep so what ? It’s her problem not yours.

She’s hardly going to be prepared to be an adult at this rate.

LanaKanesLeftNippleTassle Wed 27-Dec-17 23:56:57

Way way too strict.

By 17 she should be learning how to regulate/look after herself and set boundaries.

When are you going to let her choose her own bedtime/routine??

Totally batshit crazy, controlling, inappropriate and unfair.

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