My 16 year old is driving me mad!(2 Posts)
My DS is 17 in January. He lost his dad to cancer 2 years ago - we nursed him at home and it was tough!! HE's done OK , kept playing football, passed his GCSE's , is back at school doing A levels - which is what he wants to do but his relationship with me has deteriorated - probably quite normal - we've had brushes with weed, alcohol, staying out and managed to come through it. Since starting 6th form he has become UNBEARABLE!! Won't get out of bed, so rude and horrible to me - lives for the weekend, drinking a lot at the weekend and his mantra is 'I dont care'. We've had rules about him coming home and if not texting me to let me know he's safe and where he is... very often a number of mates stay, which I don't mind as I have the space and I'd rather they were with me - that has slipped and I've already stopped his allowance as he wont get a P/T job - he did have one but it was only for the summer - and this weekend he went out at 6.30pm on Saturday and I tracked him down at 5pm on Sunday - no understanding that he'd done anything wrong - was watching friend play footbal and was still a bit drunk i think.... So I lost it - huge argument (I had warned him that he was pushing me too far....2 weeks ago and told him to calm down a bit!! ) He left - well I told him I was struggling with his behaviour and disregard for me and if he couldn't sort himself out he could leave - -he left and stayed at a mates house round the corner - I am in touch with their mum. so what now???? I am exhausted and generally at my wits end..... I started work in September - (1st job since my DH died, as I was made redundant 2 weeks after he died.) and I have started dating a very nice man he lives miles away so don't see him often - so lots of stuff going on for DS to cope with but I am so sad that our relationship has got to this!! He never spoke about his dad's death refused all available support, counselling and continues to do so - Help!! Wow what a long post......!!
I’m sorry for your loss.
As for solutions, is there someone in your family your son would talk to, maybe someone on your late husbands side ?
I wondered why his behaviour is linked to your new relationship ? Does your son need reassurance from you
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