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19 year old DD depressed, and doesn't care. What can I do?

(2 Posts)
Glassofwhiteplease Sat 11-Nov-17 20:02:04

My daughter is depressed (I think). She tells me she is, and I am worried about her and wonder what I can do to help her. Do I just try and be supportive as possible and hope one day she will start to improve or do I need to do something else? Or is this 'normal' and she'll grow up one day and be nicer to be around. smile

Basically she lives at home with me, step dad, step sister (22). She isn't close to them but gets on ok with step sis. She is studying at local uni and has part time job. She spends almost all of her time if not working/uni in her bedroom gaming/talking to people online. She doesn't have many friends, and her closet friend is a gamer too and they only talk online and meet occasionally. Her bedroom is an absolute tip full of dirty dishes, dirty washing and rubbish. A pit basically. If I suggest she cleans her room and bring plates down she gets angry with me and tells me she's busy doing work and that I shouldnt keeping asking. She'll do it. (although Im still waiting!) Then we have a huge row and we end up no different as she just defends why she is so depressed she cannot do anything. Her and I are reasonably close but she is very different to me, in fact polar opposite She is an introvert, struggles with her confidence/anxiety issues which I think has caused so many of her issues growing up. We had a spate of self harming (which I think Tumblr had alot to do with) She has counselling/therapy via CAMHS which she hated and didnt engage with. She secretly eats and has put on so much weight over the years she is now obese. She's generally not a happy person and seems unhappy with life. She hates everything, from uni, work and life in general. She loves me, loves animals, and loves her grandparents but these are just chinks of brightness in an otherwise grey world fotr her. I try and do things with her, we do weekends away but I find her such hard work and such a challenge. It's almost like walking on egg shells around her as she's so sensitive to everything. I thought we would have grown out of this by now. I just want a happy daughter, confident to do things by herself and enjoying life. Anyone else experiencing this and any tips?

GallopingMom Sun 12-Nov-17 08:54:11

Can you encourage her to get involved with charity work? Maybe with animals if that is her interest. This will get her out of the house and in contact with other people, and it will boost her self esteem.

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