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11-year-old boys hit the town

(2 Posts)
Uther Tue 24-Oct-17 11:25:04

My Year 7 son and his friend have been begging us to let them go into our local big town / small city on their own. We had said that it was too soon. It's a 15-minute train ride. They've been there with us but we were concerned that, on their own, they'd get lost / lose their phones / get into trouble of some kind. We have now discovered that, last Saturday, they went ahead and did it on their own. They spent the afternoon at a fairground. I really don't know what to do for the best. The shift from primary to secondary school seems to be accompanied by a shift towards much greater independence. That's all good, so long as they're in our safe, small town. But they are now pushing at the boundaries. If we let this boundary go, what's next? On the other hand, should we be encouraging responsible independence? And if so, how??

cdtaylornats Tue 24-Oct-17 23:26:10

They did it and none of your worries came to pass.

On the other hand disobedience must have consequences. Can you collude with the friends parents to punish them equally? If both get the same punishment then they wont feel singled out and thus you are the bad parent.

Once the punishment is complete set a goal they need to attain and the reward is to go to town with you but have an hour or two - between feeding to do something away from you, cinema or some form of fun.

Strict deadline and return spot. Predefined punishment if not kept to.

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