DS is 17, will turn 18 in four months. He is cooperative, polite, law-abiding, hard-working, helpful around the house etc. He has always been trustworthy up till now.
He goes out to 'gatherings' at friends' houses most weekends. Occasionally he stays over, but usually he prefers to sleep at home. We have a rule that on a Friday or Saturday night he needs to be home by 1am. If he is going to stay over at a friend's house, he needs to let us know where he'll be staying before he goes out. For the past year he has always kept to this, so we no longer wait up for him or ask him to text us when he arrives home.
Last night he went to a 'gathering' at a friend's house. Same group of friends as usual. He mentioned nothing about staying over. This morning, DH & I both had to go out; we assumed DS was asleep in his room so we tried not to make noise.
DH & I got back at 1pm. At lunch, I was making polite conversation and asked DS how the party was and what time he got back. He said the party was good and that he'd got home at noon!
I'm a bit concerned that there were 11 hours when we thought DS was at home but he was actually several miles away.
On the one hand, he is nearly an adult and there's nothing wrong with him staying over at a friend's house in itself.
On the other hand, I think he should have let us know that he wasn't coming home last night. For reasons of consideration and more importantly, personal safety.
I usually implement consequences and sanctions when my younger children break rules. I haven't had to do this with him for a long while - is he a bit old for consequences now? DH & I have both explained why he should have communicated better; is that enough?
Please or to access all these features
Please
or
to access all these features
Parenting teenagers has its ups and downs. Get advice from Mumsnetters here.
Teenagers
Disciplining a 17 year old?
21 replies
TheSecondOfHerName · 22/10/2017 21:06
OP posts:
Please create an account
To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.