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Parenting teenagers has its ups and downs. Get advice from Mumsnetters here.

Teenagers

Unhappy teenager

12 replies

Christmas17 · 08/10/2017 07:04

I need some help!!! I'm SO SO SAD, and I'm really struggling with these overwhelming feelings of helplessness.
My 14 year old daughter is really unhappy at school, she doesnt seem to have any real true friends, and I can't help her, because, if I'm truthful, she's brought alot of it on herself, and I feel really guilty for saying that!!!!!!

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TiesThatBindMe · 08/10/2017 07:09

What do you mean when you say that she brought it on herself?

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Christmas17 · 08/10/2017 07:29

She is a bit of a drama queen !! She gets herself into situations, that are not always healthy, and then , as a family, we have to pick up the pieces.Which, I understand is what we're supposed to do.But I find it so hard to cope with the heartache. However, underneath all that bravado, is a vulnerable teenager just needing to be liked, I was the same as a child.

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TiesThatBindMe · 08/10/2017 07:46

All a little too vague to comment really.

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BeachysFlipFlops · 08/10/2017 07:51

Maybe have a look through some advice websites like young minds.....
youngminds.org.uk/find-help/for-parents/parents-survival-guide/
They might help you talk to her to try to get to the bottom of how you are feeling....

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DancesWithOtters · 08/10/2017 07:56

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BillywilliamV · 08/10/2017 08:00

i am in exactly the same situation, my 14 year old is so judgemental and is always falling out with friends. No answers but you're not alone. She is happy today though because she is going to see Roadtrip. ..

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Christmas17 · 08/10/2017 08:11

At the age of 10/11, she was a victim to grooming on-line ( yes, all the parental controls were in place) . This made her sexualised, and now, she craves/has obsessional relationships with boys, which are not healthy. She uses her friends to manipulate situations to be with boys.Consequently she loses friends because they probably feel used, and are sick of the drama. I struggle to see where the line is between blaming the grooming, or just being a typical teenager. I certainly was no saint!

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Christmas17 · 08/10/2017 08:16

Thankyou, I'll definately take a look.

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DancesWithOtters · 08/10/2017 11:10

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DameDiazepamTheDramaQueen · 08/10/2017 11:14

Has she had counselling?

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BigGreenOlives · 08/10/2017 11:17

The trouble with stroppy teens is that they have to be willing to engage with therapy. Does she want to try and work out her motivation?

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Christmas17 · 08/10/2017 12:06

She's had countless therapy, and has a youth support worker!

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