Excluded in year 11(7 Posts)
For having cannabis paraphernalia in school bag. They're a good school but zero tolerance for drugs. I'm not sure whether he will be permanently excluded. I'm on my own with him. His dad is useless. Before you pile in and tell me he deserves it. I agree! I absolutely despise drug use. I want to support him to make better decisions. He is really upset and worried about his future. I'm not sure what next steps are. Any advice would be great.
I would try and work closely with the school and have a look at the FRANK website and sit down with your boy for an honest discussion give him a chance to off load. Teens are funny creatures my worry would be is he doing other drugs.
He's not doing other drugs as far as I know. I'm more concerned about whether he has a school place. I'm hoping I can manage the drug issue by grounding him, stopping pocket money and if I need to I'll pick him up and take him to school. He may not have a school place. He's digging his heels in saying he won't stop smoking or go to a pupil referral unit.
if he goes to a PRU, they will ensure he gets 5 gcses incl math and english, and they will advocate on his behalf to get into a 6th form.
Most 6th forms would have a zero tolerance for drugs also, so may not get in any other way.
In the meantime, you could speak to the school exclusion project - here who may be able to secure him a managed move to another school or get him back in on probation.
I can completely empathise with you. I faced a similar situation with my son in year 10 and it was very, very tough. We managed to come through it and I now have a much better understanding of teenage behaviour as my son is very open with me now. With hind site, I realise that cannabis use amongst teenagers is very common and I don't think schools are equipped to deal with it.
Up until the incident my son had been high achieving but a brief flirtation with cannabis meant that the school cast him out. It felt like a very harsh decision.
One of the approaches you could consider is to request a 'managed move'. Here is a link: childlawadvice.org.uk/information-pages/managed-moves/. We were able to take this route and it meant that our son did not have a school exclusion on his record. You may have to raise this with the school if they have not presented this as an option. We had to be very proactive and find a school in the local area that would take our son as his school provided very little support for either us, as parents, or to my son. Thankfully, our son had a very good record up until that date so one of the local schools took him.
I hope that helps and good luck.
Thank you all. The school have been amazing. They have found him an alternative school which will be a managed move. The school are also providing him with ongoing support from those teachers he has built good relationships with over the years. They recognise these next few months are vital. They have also offered to complete his college reference for consistency. He is very lucky. I'm planning some private counselling to get him to address his cannabis use. He's grounded for the foreseeable. I will let him attend educational activities but on the whole I will be closely monitoring his free time. I know it's his own fault but I can't help but feel sad for the loss of friendships with his peers and staff.
Hi RBAW - I am so sorry you are in this situation. I was too earlier in the year and have a thread on here somewhere. I remember I was in such a bad place and couldn't see a way out.
We were very lucky that the School arranged a managed move, my DS took his GCSE's didn't do fantastically well but managed to get an Apprenticeship which at the moment he is doing amazingly well.
He too had counselling and has since been diagnosed with ASD so is in need of lots of support.
I just want you to know that you will all get through it. Your DS has a great mum who will help to steer him on the right path.
Good luck x
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