Hello, my son is 16 and in Year 11. It has not been a good year for him or us. His attendance at school is only 62% and his education is suffering. We now have Early Help involved as the school have not been very supportive. Early on in the year someone said he was fat and he has lost a lot of weight (not that he had a lot to loose!). He sometimes does not eat and is convinced he is fat, it does not matter how much we tell him he does not listen. He stays awake at night, so when he is meant to get up for school he is too tired and does not wake up until midday if not later. We have tried many different approaches like being tough and then encouraging but it is like he does not care anymore. He can get very angry and will often shout and swear at me and my partner. Also around his birthday he was accused of sexual assault and interviewed by the police but that was soon dropped when they realised it was not him. This really effected him and he is often teased about, the rumours spread like wild fire mainly due to social media. He says it does not bother him but it clearly does. To me it is like he is on self distruct and has no self esteem, sometimes there are glimmers of my happy and positive son but not often. I am just not sure the best way to deal with this and the best approach as I can not get through to him. We have tried counselling but it did not have any effect.
Can he move school? Can you move house? Can he continue his exams at college?
In this case I'd be really keen to extract him from the shit he's been surrounded with. It doesn't sound nice at all, his already fragile self esteem has taken a battering and he has to be reminded about how awesome he really is.
Any chance of him helping out at a summer camp or volunteering abroad? Promote some independence and let people get to know him for who he really is rather than all of his baggage.