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Please someone help me decide what's best?

(5 Posts)
Maryann24717 Wed 28-Dec-16 22:19:45

My son is just turned 17. He has had a couple of gf but has recently started seeing a girl. She had a miscarriage recently and now I'm at a complete loss as to how to go forward with my son from here. I was devastated to find out she was pregnant an although she lost the baby I'm petrified of it now happening again. We are arguing constantly as I don't want them being alone, I only want them to see each other in my house were I can keep an eye on them. I feel I may be pushing him away but I feel sick at the thought of giving him any kind of freedom again. Please if anyone has any advice it would be so appreciated.

eyebrowsonfleek Wed 28-Dec-16 22:58:20

I think that you need to stop thinking about your feelings and think about your son (and his gf).

Were they using protection? Has your son's opinion on contraception changed after this scare? How did he feel about the pregnancy?

It's impossible to prevent 2 teens spending time alone. Do you want them to be one of those kids caught having sex at school or in a car?

EweAreHere Wed 28-Dec-16 23:01:59

I think you have to sit him down and show him what having a child at his age means. What he'll have to do to support it properly, what it deserves, what he might have to get up to do so, etc. And how to prevent future pregnancies ... condom condom condom no matter what a girl tells him she's on ... until he's truly ready to be a father.

The reality is, you can't stop him seeing the girl or having sex. But you can show him what his life will be like if he becomes a parent before he's ready. Because you would surely expect him to step up and be a good, decent, involved father because that's what children deserve.

Maryann24717 Thu 29-Dec-16 10:46:49

Thank you so much for your replies I had preached to him since he was 16 about protection an always protect yourself no matter what. He says it was just one mistake an she was in the pill so they thought she would be ok. I was a teen mother so I know how hard it is an don't want it for either of them. They say they have learned but how do I know they have 🙈 He always told me he wading being careful an I believed him till this happened. I've lost all trust and don't know how to get it back without giving him the freedom back.

specialsubject Thu 29-Dec-16 13:29:13

Tell him that grown up games mean using condoms too.

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