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Help my friend with her teen please?

(10 Posts)
Pollyxcx Wed 28-Dec-16 17:32:52

He's 17. Left school with marginal GCSEs. Wasn't bothered about college. Enrolled and barely went. Said he was anxious, he does have issues relating to his peers. He's spent most of his teenage years shut in his bedroom on his Xbox.

He eventually refused to go to college as he couldn't cope, hated his course and in the end the college asked him to leave.

His mum has spoken until she is blue in the face about getting an apprenticeship. It goes right over his head. She's told him she'll be in trouble for not sending him to college/work. He says he'll do something.

He sleep all day, gets up about 5pm. Eats, grunts at everyone and then goes to his room. He plays Xbox online until the early hours of the morning and then goes back to
Sleep. He looks ill from lack of fresh air/sunshine.

She started dragging him out of bed in the morning. He has chores to do. The second she goes to work he goes back to bed. Lies about walking the dogs.

She doesn't give him any money, he doesn't want any!

He's a nice kid, never been in a days troouble, doesn't smoke, drink, do drugs.

He's just addicted to his Xbox. She's at the end of her tether.

Any advice?

lljkk Wed 28-Dec-16 17:49:58

Is she the only adult in the house?

Rosa Wed 28-Dec-16 17:51:28

Remove the x box for starters.

ElizaSchuyler Wed 28-Dec-16 17:53:22

Turn the wifi off overnight for a start.

Pollyxcx Wed 28-Dec-16 17:54:49

Yes dad isn't around (he's sees him but is pretty useless)

lljkk Wed 28-Dec-16 17:56:08

Depends how violent he gets in response to those things, guys, and whether she has any emotional support in the household from another adult to deal with the explosion that might follow.

I'm all for tough love but look at all the people on here who say "Over my dead body" if their DC wanted to join the military, for instance. The instinct to keep them safe is strong, at least she knows where he is every night. Besides, the lad is 90% amiable when he gets what he wants, at least he isn't out drugging & destroying.

lljkk Wed 28-Dec-16 17:59:17

She won't be in trouble for him not being in work/education. Believe me, I have BTDT. It's all on his head. Is council not ringing him every week, nagging him to do something?

I am guessing that he can play games on the console that are offline, so WiFi limits aren't enough.

Did he earn money to pay for the Xbox or is it purely something she got for him (yes the difference matters if she is going to risk taking it away).

Pollyxcx Wed 28-Dec-16 18:02:14

Something she got him. And yes if she turns the wifi off he just plays offline or goes on his phone. Phone costs nothing he doesn't ever top it up.

I've told her to get him up and lock his bedroom door so he can't go back in to his Xbox. He went apeshit at her

lljkk Wed 28-Dec-16 18:49:14

Could she be tough enough to kick him out?

MagicMary1 Wed 28-Dec-16 21:17:15

Sounds like that Xbox needs to go.

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