Long story cut very short. My OH has two DC from previous marriage, which broke down after 28 years because of his exW alcoholism and generally controlling/abusive nature. DS is 20 and DD is 14. Until recently both DC lived with my OH; the DS chose to after his parents separated and the DD after her mother physically assaulted her and became regularly verbally abusive. In June this year my OH's ExW verbally assaulted all of us in a local supermarket and physically assaulted my OH at the same time, all in front of her DC! She was arrested, went to court and ended up with a 2 year conditional discharge. My OH hasn't heard a peep from her since, she ignores him in the street. They've never really communicated anyway since the divorce.
My OH's DD is a typical teenager; spent a lot of time in her room and rarely communicated unless she wanted something.
At the end of the school holidays this August, she went to stay for a couple of days with her mother, who has now settled into a rented house after sofa surfing for months. DD has not returned home to my OH since. It turns out DD's mother is down with the school, as her permanent residence, where before the holidays it was my OH.
DD hasn't bothered to come and talk to her Dad about the situation; that she wants to live with her mother, she hasn't visited, she rarely responds to text messages and won't answer the phone to him. He invited her a tea a couple of weeks ago, she accepted and then the day before she cancelled saying her mother's family were visiting (the didn't want to know either DC after the split). He invited her out for lunch yesterday and no reply. He always texts her good morning and good night, but no response.
It's almost like she doesn't want to know him anymore, has just cut him off and this upsets my OH tremendously.
For the last 18 months he has ensured that both his DC have a happy, stable home life, haven't gone without anything, he cooked/cleaned and sorted out all school related stuff for his DD.
I also cannot make sense of this situation; I know it's not my business directly and I wouldn't get involved, however it upsets me that this is happening and I'd like to be able to support my OH through this. I've always had a good relationship with both DC so it's a little upsetting to me too.
Can anyone actually relate to this at all?
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Can anyone make any sense of this situation?
11 replies
Cygnet44 · 10/10/2016 15:21
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