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Teenage son self harming

(6 Posts)
friedhappy Fri 05-Aug-16 15:31:50

I think my teenage son (18) is self harming, but I can't be sure. I have seen wounds and scars on his lower arms (just above the wrist) which, when I mentioned them, he said were nothing and hastily changed the subject. It's taken me a while to realise that it may be self harm. This year I have never seen him in a anything short sleeved.

I really don't know how to talk to him about it, if that would be the right thing.

Please could somebody give me some advice.

Thank you

TheSecondOfHerName Fri 05-Aug-16 22:33:29

HedgehogHedgehog Fri 05-Aug-16 22:37:17

If you do speak to him about it its very important not to be confrontational or demand to see him arms. Perhaps you could do something like write him a letter saying that you think he may be self harming and does he want to talk about it and just outline that you love him and are there for him. Then he can process that info and come to you in his own time and you can hopefully avid him becoming angry or defensive. xxx

HedgehogHedgehog Fri 05-Aug-16 22:37:42

*his *avoid

AtiaoftheJulii Fri 05-Aug-16 23:21:25

I was very matter-of-fact, and just asked what dc was using to cut themself - rather than "are you cutting?" which could be denied. Then talked about keeping clean and not infected. And then later on talked about the possibility of getting some outside help, someone to talk to, etc.

Hugs to you, it's a horrible thing to see your child deliberately hurting themself, leaving scars, and so on.

friedhappy Sat 06-Aug-16 15:37:57

TheSecondOfHerName Thanks for that link, it's very useful. I haven't reacted and am thinking carefully about this now and trying to understand as much as possible.

HedgehogHegehog and AtiaoftheJulii thank you both, I will try to be as gentle as possible.

I just don't want to feel he has to hide it and cover himself up in heavy unsuitable clothes in boiling hot weather.

Thank you all very much.

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