16 year old into drugs !!(2 Posts)
Hello I have one child who is my daughter who is 16, I treasure her so much as she is my only child but recently since she has got a boyfriend she has changed dramatically! I have caught her numerous times with various different drugs hidden in her bedroom. I have confronted her about it but she will not listen to what I have to say or answer who and why she has these, any advice ?
The important thing is not to panic, confront her, blame BF & end up with both of you in a position that's difficult to come back from.
What kind of drugs have you found?
There is a rally good website called 'Talk to Frank'. This gives clear information about the drugs that are available, dangers, side effects, symptoms etc. It also gives advice to parents on how to deal with the situation.
My feeling is that she 'allowed' you to 'find' them in her bedroom. If she really didn't want you to find them she would have hidden them better.
I remember at the age of 16 I made sure that my Embassy No6 (bought from a machine outside a shop - yes they had them in 197? ) were well hidden behind all the old paint tins in the garden shed. That way, in the unlikely event that they were found, no-one could, with certainty, link them to me .
I wonder if she may be out of her depth with BF but doesn't want to lose face, and/or potentially her BF by admitting it. 16 year old's don't always feel able to say to their BF that things are going too fast as they are afraid that they will appear to be a prude and be laughed at.
Maybe if you find out all there is to know about what you found, you could approach the subject from a perspective of calmly, and genuinely wanting to understand why she chose to take these?
Maybe she hasn't, but she she wants you to understand that she's growing up &, out of your love for her, you've not noticed her previous attempts to provoke your notice of this.
Teens' minds work in a confusion of child and adult - I wouldn't want to relive those years!
I too only have the one child and it's just been the 2 of us for many years. We are very close. I've found all stages of allowing him to be independent & take responsibility for his life hurts. I was inconsolable for days when he left Primary School because I knew that his childhood had ended - from now on he would move further away from me.
At 16 your daughter is coming to the end of her 'chrysalis' years. Now is the time when you cement your role as someone dependable who she can share all her adult problems with.
Does that make sense? Good luck & let me know how you get on. <hug>
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