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If you charge your child much

(10 Posts)
BB9791 Thu 12-May-16 10:26:24

So I have a daughter who is 17..18 in a few months.

She was attending college then decided it was boring. Changed course but then stopped attending. Due to this I've had to stop the child benefit and my council tax has gone from single person to being full. I've recently moved house with her as left my partner and am struggling and stressing about money.

She has a job that is usually 5 dats a week.

I talked to her last night about the fact id like her to contribute some,thing which didn't go down well. Apparently she doesn't 'lIve here'? She's does absolutely nothing to contribute towards anything and leaves a trail of destruction behind they do!

corythatwas Thu 12-May-16 11:50:45

Mine is 19 so slightly different (not least because she is more mature so easier to reason with). We charge her 10% of her earnings. We expect very little in the way of chores as she has ongoing health issues, but she has to buy and cook one meal/week for the family.

Reason for the low rent is that she is saving for higher education + we're not struggling, so happy to see money being laid aside for that.

StillMedusa Sat 14-May-16 00:55:48

I charge DS1 £30 a week. He's currently off travelling Australia and while he was working in a social care job he earned more than I do, but was not eating masses at home, so it was more a token 'light , heat, showers and I do your washing' deal smile

DS2 has just started a job (amazing as he has autism and learning disability) at Asda.. 28 hours a week. I will charge him the same. It's more about the 'this is the adult world.. you pay to live here' than the actual money.

DS1 had the opportunity to house share with mates last year but preferred to stay home and acknowledged that he knew he was lucky only paying £30 a week! Plus he liked having a clean home, food in the fridge and Mum changing his sheets (yes I'ma sucker...)

If she is earning than she should be contributing... or she moves out!

FarelyKnuts Sat 14-May-16 01:05:47

18% of earnings was the figure I was charged as soon as I started earning back when I was 14. No idea how my mother came up with this figure.
Still bitch about her taking a cut of my meagre Saturday job earnings to this day and I'm 37 now grin Moved out when I was 16!

Florida41 Sat 14-May-16 11:10:12

I have always said when you start to earn your own money you should always pay your way . To learn through life nothing is free and not to take anything for granted.
I gave both my older teens 5- 6 months free rent when they got a job ( so they could get some savings together) and then asked them to start paying rent .
my ds 20 hated it at 16 when he had a part time job and had to pay rent , but now 21 he understands and appreciates that it's a lot cheaper to live at home than to move out to his own place. he tells his sister that too.
He pays about 15% of his wages
he earns about £1100 -1200 and gives me £200 a month.
but if we have family takeaway or meal out or we all go to the cinema , I always pay . so he gets a lot back .
I do all his washing and cook his meals , I'm proberly abit soft but oh well .
my dd16 has a part time Saturday job and earns ££120-140 a month sometimes more in the holidays and she gives me £20 a month .

whoseafraidofnaomiwolf Wed 18-May-16 15:08:53

DS 18. Works party time: A third to me (1/2 of which goes into a secret savings account for him & 1/2 toward family Christmas fund); A third for him, and a third into his savings. We provide everything including clothes at the moment (he has no interest in shopping).

AnyFucker Wed 18-May-16 15:12:46

Working it out just now, it's about an eighth of the salary

weaselwords Wed 18-May-16 15:17:22

My eldest is on £600 a month apprentice wages. I don't take money from him, on the understanding that he saves £200 a month, so a third of his wages. He does his own washing and the dishwasher every other day.

Jennyf68 Wed 18-May-16 15:33:37

I have 4 children, 32, 21, 19 and 17, and I've always charged them 1/4 of their wages for rent, made them save 1/4 and then they have half for spending.

2 older sons have moved out but I still have my daughter and youngest son at home. They are responsible for their own rooms, washing, cooking and making sure everything is clean after cooking. If I'm cooking a meal I will plate some up for them or leave leftovers on the fridge for them to heat up if they want it. Same with washing too, if I'm doing some washing and I don't have a full load I will offer to do some of their washing. I still buy them toiletries, food and things they need urgently.

Daughter, 19, earns £1200 a month so gives me £300, saves £300 and has £600 to spend. Son, 17, earns £900 so gives me £225, saves £225 and has £450 to spend.

I started charging this pretty much as soon as they got jobs for the youngest 3 and the eldest had his first child when he was only 16, got pregnant at 15, so I took 1/4 off of him as soon as he got a job at 15 to put into savings, didn't charge rent as he needed the money to spend on his girlfriend and child, and then took another 1/4 off of him for rent when he turned 18.

But because I am charging rent I am also relaxed on the rules, they all obviously had to respect me and my home, but I don't give them curfews or rules to follow anymore and they can have friends or boy/girlfriends over whenever they want as long as friends are respectful too and if the friends are expecting dinner when I am cooking they are to let me know.

SpidersFromMars Wed 18-May-16 16:04:51

Like whoseafraidofnaomiwolf, I had to give 1/3 to my parents. That worked out well.

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