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What's the norm 15 yr old and boyfriends

(6 Posts)
Momofonedd Sun 03-Apr-16 23:40:01

Dd has been "officially"going out with her best friend (since year 7) for four months but been (not official her words) seeing him for 6.. What's the norm when it comes to what they are getting up to.. They don't have much alone time but are very flirty (lots of tickling etc) cuddling, hugging and kissing.. I'm happy that they are taking stuff slow but sort of worried that he's with her cos he is worried that their friendship will be lost if he's not and he doesn't fancy her.. I don't know what the norm is if that makes sense !

WhatTheActualFugg Mon 04-Apr-16 21:39:04

You're worried your DD's boyfriend doesn't find her attractive?


Peebles1 Mon 04-Apr-16 22:44:31

I think they're all different momo. Cuddling, kissing, flirting sounds the norm to me. I have 3 DCs. All 18 and over now. DD had sex at just 15, had probably been seeing her bf for the same amount of time as yours. No I wasn't happy but had to accept it. Other 2 DCs were different - waited a bit longer.

Try not to worry too much about the bf's reasons for going out with her. There's nothing you can do about that. But keep the lines of communication open with DD just incase sex is on the cards (which I'm not saying it is, but you never know).

Momofonedd Mon 04-Apr-16 22:58:55

I suppose it's because they were best friends for so long before. My concern is that he's with her so no one else has her if that makes sense

Momofonedd Mon 04-Apr-16 22:59:49

I've had the chat.. They aren't in that place yet but I'm aware things can change quickly

corythatwas Tue 05-Apr-16 10:56:49

Quite frankly, you are overthinking this.

15 is an age for experimenting and finding out about relationships. It is very unlikely that he will turn out to be the one or that their relationship will last a long time. So from that pov it doesn't matter whether he fully fancies her or not: she will almost certainly have to deal with them splitting up sooner or later.

But it is good practice in handling other people gently. And if they both manage that, there is no reason they should not remain good friends.

And if no one else has her- as long as he is not being controlling or makes her unhappy- why does that matter at 15? It's not as if she is going to end up on the shelf if she isn't married after her first season- we are not living in the 18th century. Maybe he is too immature to understand a proper grown-up relationship- but then he is 15, that is allowed. If she is happy with this, even if it isn't perfect love, it's not as if she can't afford to take her time.

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