D s gap year

(19 Posts)
ginorwine Tue 16-Feb-16 08:58:03

Ds worked up until now on his gap year and had planned to go to India ,Thailand .
His friend has now backed down saying that he wants to stay in Europe and only go for a couple of weeks .
He has asked other pals but they don't have the money as this is new idea to them .
My ds is really disappointed but won't discuss options with us .
His friend wants to go to Norway which is very expensive so they will get less time for their money there , although it looks wonderful .my ds had planned to save some money to see if when he gets to uni there are others he can travel with then in holidays .
I'm wondering if there are any travel companies that support people to travel alone .whilst he says he's fine he lacks confidence whilst also being frustrated .
He has books about vol work etc he just says he will go with his pal for two weeks .he is spending most days in the house now doing nothing s he wants to keep hold of his cash .
He is I must admit driving me mad as he is clearly lonely but won't do anything about it and it seems such a waste of a gap year .
The deal for the gap year was some work , some travel some chill time .the chill time is too much now ! Any ideas .? In the day I ask him to walk the dog or do a house job but other than that he does very little and I know that he is frustrated but won't actually do anything about it !

OP’s posts: |
Pidapie Tue 16-Feb-16 09:17:40

I'm Norwegian, and can assure you it's not that expensive at the moment due to a recession there. It's affordable with the currency now, though more London prices than up North for example. It's definitely worth going there, it's a completely different culture and different scenery to here smile Shame his friends backed down, I'm sure it would be a great experience to travel further afield. Could he do a short course or something like that for fun perhaps, now that he has more time than initially planned?

ginorwine Tue 16-Feb-16 09:26:00

Thanks - that has cheered me ! Everyone kept saying how expensive it was -people who had been - I've never been so just listened to their experience .
Thanks .good to know !

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BackInTheRealWorld Tue 16-Feb-16 09:27:43

Tell him to go to India and Thailand anyway, he will meet up with plenty of other people doing the same - it's not like going on holiday alone.

jammiecat Tue 16-Feb-16 09:36:11

No specific advice but he might find some interesting opportunities via https://www.workaway.info/ My SIL advertises via this site and they get all sorts of different people, including some on their own.

ginorwine Tue 16-Feb-16 09:56:31

I told him this .
Doesn't have the confidence 😞

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Frazzled2207 Tue 16-Feb-16 10:12:13

If he/you can afford it send him on a group tour thing in the far east at least as a starting point. Check out intrepid. Most of the others will be solo young travellers.
A shame his friend is flaky.

What about Australia/nz. I travelled there on my own and it's very easy to meet people and safe. And he could stopover in asia on the way there/back.


TreadSoftlyOnMyDreams Tue 16-Feb-16 11:15:11

This company might give him some inspiration - they have very detailed itineraries on their website. Plus you can travel there under your own cost and just pay for the guided parts. Means he could stay on afterwards if he wanted to also.

ginorwine Tue 16-Feb-16 11:52:24

I've forwarded the links to him ! Thanks .!

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VimFuego101 Tue 16-Feb-16 11:54:18

I think he should just go - there will be lots of other solo travelers.

ImperialBlether Tue 16-Feb-16 11:58:17

My daughter went to Canada when she was 18 - she went with BUNAC - I think that was the only way she could get a working visa. She met the others on the flight over there and they all ended up living together.

ginorwine Tue 16-Feb-16 12:46:23

I've told him lots of times but he just says ok or that he can't go alone .im tearing my hair out .he has so much choice but won't take it .i understand he feels let down by his friend .
Gap year had been agreed on basis that he did something eg work , travel , voluntary work .since he finished work in Nov has tried to organise the travel with pal who agreed but now wants minimum time away eg 2 weeks and in europe.
I've said if he doesn't arrange something such as vol work by end of March then he has to pay rent if he isn't doing anything useful .

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TreadSoftlyOnMyDreams Tue 16-Feb-16 13:05:59

He's a bit late to work a ski season but being available to start work at Easter gives him a huge head start for resort / hotel work /summer employment?

What is he planning to study at university? If he's going to travel during the uni hols then why not try to get work exp/internships now?

Lightbulbon Tue 16-Feb-16 13:10:18

If he doesn't have the confidence to travel solo then a gap year was a mistake for him.

Tell him to get on a plane or to get a job in McDonald's!

ginorwine Tue 16-Feb-16 14:36:22

He had plans to go with pal who changed his mind .😔Plenty confidence then .but not alone .i agree I have said by end next month if not travel he will have to pay board etc -incentive !

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specialsubject Tue 16-Feb-16 18:41:52

there are plenty of companies who've spotted this issue, and those on the well trodden paths such as Oz and NZ can buy 'starter weeks' where you get picked up from the airport, meet lots of people all in the same boat and get activities etc for the first week. Sign up and you also get put in touch with the others so you can arrange to fly out together.

may even operate for Thailand.

he can do 2 weeks in Europe throughout his working life. Of course he can make opportunities for big trips too.

I do agree that if he is that dependent on one friend, he's not ready for the big trip. Fine - many aren't. I wouldn't have been!

getting a job will do much more for his confidence and maturity.

eatyourveg Wed 17-Feb-16 09:44:28

hava look at this for India - seems they do a 4 week trip or here for Thailand.

ds is off to St Lucia with them in the summer, going alone

iwantbrewstersmillions Wed 17-Feb-16 09:47:41

Tell him to look at stray Asia. It's aimed at backpackers. It's hop on hop off so if he likes somewhere he can stay longer and he will be travelling with other people.


Becksa Sun 21-Feb-16 13:21:23

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