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so stressed out and traumatised

(5 Posts)
kukky Mon 11-Jan-16 00:03:01

where do i begin.i feel traumatised by the last year

my son who had never been a problem met up with a group on the street who offered him legal highs and he ended up addicted to them
about 4month ago he ended up in hospital after having a pycotic episode and agreed he needed to stop.which meant cutting ties with his new found friends but its been very difficult.hes quiet and shy so struggled to find anyone new so now and then hes had a few relapses meeting up with the lads again

but the worse thing is he started college but had a complete meltdown couldnt keeep up with it all.went missing police found him in a state so he had to speak to emergency mental health team who suggested he needs stop attending college and see gp for mental health referal.this was months ago we are still waiting.he is definately suffering depression and perhaps pycotic episodes brought on by the drug use

and a few days ago he got upset again hadnt slept all night and went of missing again text me to say he was up a local hill near the seaside.text me sayign he on way back down and then that was it no calls no texts so i had to call police who have search team out looking.he turned up at a mates house miles away that evenign but despite him havign been on the high risk as a vunerable person all this time they were searching they left him at his mates flat

a known drug user.the police said he didnt appear to be at risk to himself or others so because of his age left him there.its a nightmare i hadnt slept for 28hrs then even though hes been found he still hasnt contacted me and ive not caught up on much sleep.i cant understand how the system expects us to keep our teens safe when that age they can stay away if they want

summer68 Tue 12-Jan-16 00:08:31

Totally feel for you, Kukky. When through similar with my ds- this site was a life saver for me, so I come back to visit from time to time - to offer support, as I understand the trauma.
It worries me that so many teens suffer in this way - what are we doing as a society to create this?
My ds only got outside help when he got into trouble with the police- then they gave him a mentor - which helped a great deal.
I'm so sorry for what's happened to you- you must be exhausted emotionally and physically.
Your ds will not be able to comprehend your emotions- something happens to their brains and they become self absorbed- unable to understand the consequence of their actions it seems. It so difficult to deal with.
My ds is coming back to us slowly - I didn't ever believe he would - people told me he would but I just couldn't see how. But we have lots more good days than bad now- keep hopeful - it's a phase- a horrible nightmare phase, but it will pass.
Post here often - I found it helps to get support without judgement.
You didn't mention your ds age ?

kukky Tue 12-Jan-16 02:41:40

HI summer thanks for replying i really do need support its awful ive not found anyone to talk to.i even rang samaritans tonight as id called the police again to say i still hadnt heard from my son but they were awful with me this time said they asked social services who said cannot report him missing again as hes 17 now and for me not to report it as hes now not at home so as far as they are concenre hes left home and decided not to return therefore i cant even ask them to go round and check hes ok.ive since found out that he is back on legal highs.and that the place he is stayign is known to the police as 2 more runaways have had to be taken home from there even younger than my ds
they were quite angry with me and so different than they had been the day before so im not sure whats happened maybe they are just thinking its not mental health issues he is just choosing to take a substance that can cause these things and therefore its his choice and if he wont help himself then they wont either

Clare1971 Tue 12-Jan-16 17:39:06

I'm fairly sure if he's under 18 the police are supposed to act, especially if he's considered vulnerable. I think it depends where you are and maybe that he's a boy. When my DD (17) went missing and I told them about her mental health issues they took it really seriously and when they found her (in fact she took herself to the local police station) they told her they would not close the case until she was back home and they brought her home. Whenever I have problems with people who are supposed to be helping me with my daughter I have a really awful phrase I use which seems to get results. I keep asking until I'm talking to the highest person I can get hold of (not usually very high) and then I ask them for their full name and say 'If anything happens to my daughter I will be holding you personally responsible.' I hate saying this, especially when sometimes I'm talking to overstretched, stressed, well meaning people but I've found it's the one thing which tends to get some action.

Clare1971 Tue 12-Jan-16 17:39:45

Meant to add, I really feel for you. flowers

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