18 year old help self and lies(5 Posts)
Anyone any advice on my , at times, v challenging 18 year old. Still at home as had mental health (anxiety etc) issues at college so changed colleges and repeated year. However, not what I am posting about...nor the amount of time she spends in room/on line/phone etc..normal teenage I think?
Do your 18 year olds lie and help themselves to your things? She seems to be a pathalogical liar, and has been for most of her life, although we have tried to stamp on it..without success it seems. Just found a magazine she was supposed to return to the library for me (I told her she did't need to if didnt have time) in October...which the library have chased me for and she SWORE she had returned ad they had mis filed it. I feel awful as they wrote it off as she convinced me so much (she WILL be paying the library for it) I even told her at the time it didn't matter if she forgot to return it, but to tell me, but again she swore she had returned it.
She is always taking my things and today has taken one of my best tops and worn it (I know cos it appeared on MDs snap chat! and MD and daughter bit shocked she hadn't asked when I said, "That's MY top!" (not the first time she has taken it..and I told her then to ASK) and I have just found a lipstick and my i pod speakers in her room (went in to vacuum) I know it's petty but I feel cross she doesn't feel the need to ask...she just takes. This includes the house phone, food and even on occassion we have got back to find DH 's car missing (she is insured on it but he would like her to mention it when she borrows it...or is he being fussy?)
So....any answers. DH is putting lock on our bedroom door as I type...I didn't want it to come to this as I don't like locks on doors but it's getting so I don't feel I have ownership of my stuff...which I ALWAYS lend when asked! I don't mess about in her room and go through her stuff and certainly don't take it and I have asked her repeatedly not to take my things.
We had a similar though not as serious problem with our younger daughter, taking makeup, money etc. We out a lock on our bedroom door, don't like it but it works.
Mine does this it's infuriating even my knickers . She helps herself to everything then just says "oh sorry" when I speak with her but doesn't stop her doing it again and again. I went out last weekend and as I was getting ready discovered my hair straighteners, mascara, bronzer and eyeshadow palette were no where. She took them to her friends house when I called her she said "it doesn't matter borrow mine". I'm thinking a lock is in order to!
Yup, my best make up always goes missing and turns up in her room. Infuriating!!
Is she getting help for her MH situation? I think a lock is an excellent idea and personally I would tell her she can no longer use my car and I would make sure I always had the keys.
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