DD (13) has just been dumped by her first proper boyfriend. They started seeing each other at the start of the holidays and spent loads of time together over the summer, mainly in a big group of local kids, all pretty innocent. I met him a few times and he seemed nice but not nice enough apparently to do the decent thing when he decided he was no longer interested - instead he got together with a load of their mates and got a couple of them to phone her and tell her she was dumped and to deal with it.
She's OK but I feel so hurt on her behalf that he (and their other friends tbh) could treat her like this - I know 13 year old boys are pretty immature but I would be mortified if DD was ever that unkind to someone. It's probably for the best as they are pretty young but that's not the point :(
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Feel so sad that kids can be this mean :(
CambridgeBlue · 13/09/2015 15:55
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Dd is still friends with her first boyfriend 11 years later he has his own boyfriend now 
My ds has been dumped by two long term male friends this summer - because they now have girlfriends and they are more important than he is. He is so sad. 
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I have mixed feelings on this.
DD has always been highly inclusive. Throughout secondary she was friends with quite a few girls who were socially anxious/a bit different.
When she left her school in the summer, to attend a different sixth form, one wrote her a lovely letter acknowledging how kind DD had been, hoping they would stay in touch.
TBH DD hasn't stayed in touch. She's thrown herself into her new life and the small amount of time she has to keep up with old friendships, has been spent with a few who are easier to incorporate into her new schedule. I feel awful for that girl, who I know is now probably freindless . But on the other hand I can see it from DD's point of view.
My DD had her first boyfriend at the same age, again, totally innocent (they didn't even kiss or hold hands 
) and it was ended by him in a non- mean way.
However, and I do think this is important, DD made it very clear when she agreed to go out with him how she would like it to be ended i.e. that whomever decided that they wanted 'out' should do the decent thing and tell the other, giving a brief explanation. His explanation was that DD didn't seem interested enough in him, she wasn't (I think she just liked the idea of having a boyfriend 
).
Still, it was a nice gentle introduction for her into a world, which you are right OP, can involve meanness. But I do think there are things that we as parents can do to help our DC along - I'm pleased that DD took my advice to talk about this sort of stuff upfront.
My DS was dumped by his girlfriend the second day of our family holiday and then two days later she announced her new boyfriend on Instagram 
.
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