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Pocket money, helping around the house, lump sum university/wedding/car

(9 Posts)
Brighteyes27 Mon 05-Jan-15 19:08:23

Ideas please on pocket money for 10 year olds. Would like to help children appreciate value of money. Currently we don't do pocket money as children close in age so squabble accusing one another of taking each other's money etc. We currently buy all clothes, pay for sweets at least a couple of times a week and for all days out/treats etc. But with secondary school looming we we're thinking we might start with small amounts of pocket money. How do others work this and do you link pocket money to chores/behaviour? On top of any pocket monies do you encourage saving for holiday spending or a computer game or encourage them to top up longer term savings with unused birthday monies etc or do you just put money away for University/wedding/car? Do you have several accounts etc.

Back in the dark ages when I was young I remember post office savings stamps and I loved to get a stamp each week with my pocket money and see my card filling up/money accumulating. I also had a couple of premium bonds with small amounts and as I got older had several tubs one for savings, one for Christmas presents one for clothes etc and also enjoyed that. I know it's different in every family and all their friends do very different things but our two think they are worse off than their friends when in reality this isn't true. One friend brags about getting x amount per week but this is money put aside for uni, plus pocket money etc etc.

Thanks

MaybeDoctor Mon 05-Jan-15 19:19:55

Understanding that it was important to save for university etc was drummed in to me from about age 12 onwards - thank goodness my mother was on the ball about this; if it had been left to my father I would not have gone at all!

I saved from birthday gifts, pocket money, babysitting, Saturday job earnings and eventually from summer jobs. I always had a good sense of the value of a pound, even if my parents possibly took this a bit too far at times...

I know that part-time work is harder to find these days, so maybe some as pocket-money and some for doing chores would be a good starting point?

Brighteyes27 Mon 05-Jan-15 20:05:10

Thanks yes another problem is behaviour attitude laziness etc. They sit laying around plugged into IPads xbox whilst I/we run round after them so realise things are likely to get much worse before they get better if don't instill some responsibility into them and make changes sharpish. We love them to bits and want them to have a full childhood but I am shattered and thinking ahead. I have started taking iPads off them not letting them have them until they have done something like; tidied their rooms, put the recycling out, fed the dog (they wanted), finished their homework, got their PE kit out, put clean underwear away etc. But only recently, they are really resentful this is not linked it to pocket money and I feel like a dragon etc.

TeenAndTween Mon 05-Jan-15 20:20:54

We limit screen time for our DDs (15 and 10).

Broadly speaking, none in the morning, after school only after homework etc, at w/e only after having done some fresh air / exercise. Relaxed a bit in Christmas holidays but that's the gist of it.

Pocket money is unconditional but limited (£3/wk for DD2, £25/month for DD1). This is for discretionary spend such as toys, magazines, music, makeup. We could easily afford more, but choose not to as we want them to value money and to be able to live on limited budgets when they first leave home / go to university or whatever.
We also quietly save for their future.

Regular jobs round the home are limited as we consider them being at school and doing homework as their main priority, but they are expected to help if requested, especially things like laying the table for meals.

Brighteyes27 Mon 05-Jan-15 21:24:04

I like your thinking T&T. I have very similar ideas but Hubbie very much more relaxed and regimented. Like you we have relaxed things a lot recently as I haven't been well and then with Christmas holidays. Does the child who gets £3 get to spend it in anyway he wants and do you still buy sweets/treats or does this come out of the £3?

GnomeDePlume Mon 05-Jan-15 21:58:12

DCs have been getting pocket money into their bank accounts since they started at primary school.

We encourage them to save for larger purchases. Paying the money into the bank accounts rather than into their hands puts a certain amount of waiting into the wanting.

If they are going out with their friends then they have to cover their own spends.

We dont tie pocket money to chores as we expect them to do their share as being part of the household.

TeenAndTween Tue 06-Jan-15 19:02:46

DD2 gets um.. nudged.. shall we say?

Broadly speaking we wouldn't let her blow it all on sweets every week. Saving occurs because she doesn't have easy access to shops without us, but £2 or so in a charity shop or magazine she gets to choose.
We wouldn't let her spend £20 in a toy shop without having a plan for what she wants in advance.

I do buy occasional treats. Also books from Oxfam Bookshop I pay for. If we are out and about and an ice-cream is needed then we always pay.

Brighteyes27 Tue 06-Jan-15 21:18:20

We have always paid for everything. But both have different lots of friends who all seem better off than my two (according to my two) in terms of the pocket money they are allowed to spend on sweets on a Friday or additional OTT monies they are allowed to bring and spend on sweets and crap toys at youth club etc. It's difficult to save anything out of £3 but then wouldn't like to see/have them blowing much more.

Sonothappeningyet Fri 09-Jan-15 17:26:01

We give out 13yo DS £5 per week as well as a generous dinner money allowance which I think subsidises him further. But do expect him to undertake a few chores. Bins each week, lay and clear the table and empty dishwasher. There is only 3 of us and we argue that we all contribute to the household. He is really good and often helps with other little tasks too (peel veg / grate cheese...) What he spends his money is his business but he is expected to buy his own deodorant and stuff like that (although he gets extras from us occasionally too) and guitar strings rugby tape and other consumables for his hobbys. Likewise 'designer' clothes must be saved for of are special gifts.

If he goes on big none-educational trips (skiing, rugby tour) he is expected to contribute financially and will do extra jobs to earn his contribution or use birthday / Christmas money. We could just pay but I want him to realise that working is about enabling the good stuff in life and money doesn't grow on trees. Both DH and I have always worked and come from families than weren't financially well off. My family are pretty good at finding summer jobs for him like shed painting and we set the contribution at a realistic level.

That said he is regularly taken to rugby matches and treats with us and we pay as well as the odd special school trip too. Not to mention music lessons and exams which he knows all have a cost. Plus treats and stuff when we are out.

Never had a problem with money going on sweets other than when his friends are around as he is usually too much of an athlete - my body is a temple.

I think he gets more cash than most of his friends but then he also helps out more as he occasionally mentions. But usually the question around how much pocket money do they get stops a moan quickly.

Personally I don't agree that school and no helping at home is a good mix. Education is really important but at uni they have to manage both so helping develop life skills and time management is important too.

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