Not sure if this is in the right topic, but would be interested in your views. I have two teenage girls 13 and 16, the youngest if ok about christmas, but the eldest just wants to be out with her friends. I dont have a problem with that as such, but I would like to make christmas as good as I can. Over the years are family has dwindled, so this year it is just the four of us, we will be going to the inlaws for lunch, but husband and his father do not get on. Also, we have a familty business which means husband is at work until late christmas eve and only off for two days. Should I force eldest daughter to do some things with us in the hope that she will enjou herself, or should I resign myself to them doing there own thing, knowing this is what they really want to do.
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I think Christmas just changes as they get older. I feel a bit sad about it all TBH. They are having presents they know about, Grandparents are giving them vouchers etc. No more mince pies out for Santa, or the excitement of Christmas morning. Last few years we have had to wake them up. 
Christmas Eve maybe cook a meal together/order pizza and watch Christmassy film if they are up for it? Invite some of their friends round to yours?
That all costs £££££s Bonsoir. My teens like football.
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Our teens get a bit moany now about going to relatives on the significang Christmas days, so I tend to get everyone to us these days. Ds1 may not be able to be with us over Christmas - not his choice, just circumstances. But he's only 18 and that does seem too young, and very, very strange. We (and he) are really hoping he will be with us, but that's a big change for us all if he isn't 
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Ours are also dds of 16 (well, she will be by Christmas) and 13. Also just the 4 of us this year although we hope to see a bit of Granny (85) on Christmas Day.
It's definitely changed - for us this is the first year where they know what they'll be getting so although "Santa" will come there will be few surprise presents. We're insisting that the mince pies and whiskey being left out, though, which they've agreed to as long as we also eat the carrot they leave for the reindeer .
We've just been to buy some new Christmas decorations and let the girls help choose them, because this year they really didn't want us to haul out all their nursery/school made ones for display. We've also changed it so that instead of me doing the dinner whilst dh plays with Christmas stuff with the girls (which kept them out of the way when they were small) he and the girls are doing the dinner this year. We're also planning to learn some card games for the evening, and dd1 will be allowed a little glass of something. Christmas Eve at their insistence we'll be watching Muppet Christmas Carol, The Snowman and Father Christmas as we've always done.
So basically we're trying to upgrade the traditions we used to have, making them similar ones but more appropriate for their ages. I think we have to say goodbye to the shiny-eyed magical Santa years but hopefully replace them with something that's also good family time.
Kaz, I think lots of teens are like this. Mine have both asked for money from us, and have had money from GP's, etc for years now. However, they do want stockings still! Re doing stuff together, it also depends on what their friends are doing - if they are busy with their families then it makes it a bit easier
We have to do a bit of give and take with arrangements, but we do stuff with old family friends quite a bit, so it does mean that they get to be with other teens (who are old friends from birth/nursery)
We always go for pizza and the theatre on Christmas Eve with friends and have just tried to find suitable stuff for their ages as they have grown.
We stopped going to mass on Christmas Day last year as they just don't get up in time and went to midnight mass on Christmas Eve instead which seemed to go OK.
We go to the pub on Christmas Day and DH and DS go to a match on Boxing Day whilst DD and I often go to the sales, then we have a party at ours in the evening with local friends (lots of teens as well as adults)
DD is making noises about going out with her mates on NYE, rather than a family friend's party, but we'll see about that!
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