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Moving out, junk food diet

(15 Posts)
Hereshoping1 Sun 30-Nov-14 05:24:38

DS (19) has an apprenticeship quite a distance away, pay not huge. He has been given an opportunity to move into a flat nearer work. He could just about afford this, but has asked if we could help out. His siblings went off to uni and we helped them so I don't have a problem with this from a point of view of fairness. However, he has the most terrible diet - all junk food and rubbish - this terrifies me as away from home he probably won't eat anything decent at all (at least living here he has the ocassional vegetable). And if we help him financially he will simply be able to afford more junk food. I can't believe how little he cares about this and what it will do to him long term. We have not had the same issue with his older DS - eats normally and fairly well - as a family we rarely eat processed foods, eat a normal diet really, without being too hung up on it. He is putting on a lot of weight. I know it might be too late but does anyone have any suggestions as to a) try and convince him to treat himself better b) get him interested in cooking. And have just googled where he might be living - KFC on one corner, chip shop down the road... Aagh

Heyho111 Sun 30-Nov-14 06:49:24

There's not a lot you can do. A lot go through this. How about making him some meals which he could stick in the freezer. And entice him back for Sunday dinner. It's v difficult.

bonzo77 Sun 30-Nov-14 06:57:56

It's out of your control. Either he lives independently and feeds himself. Or he doesn't. Do you really know exactly what his siblings ate while away at uni?

The only thing I'd suggest is that when he runs out of money (having blown it all in KFC) you help him go through his budget. Get him to write down every penny he spends and then show him how he could spend less feeding himself mostly from the supermarket rather than Dominoes. snf make the money hand outs contingent on him doing so.

bonzo77 Sun 30-Nov-14 06:58:46

snf? I mean AND.

Timeforabiscuit Sun 30-Nov-14 07:09:10

This may be a bit left field, and apologies if this offends!

First place of his own is a big thing, and at some point he's probably going to be bringing back a girlfriend/boyfiend! grin

A partner is not going to be impressed with his ability to dial for a pizza, so if he wants to learn to impress - best he learns how to stock a larder and cook properly, you know,like a grown up !

Is there an aldi/ lidl nearby? Trouble is at 19 your short on time,money and a full days works is knackering - so maybe get him to do the next weeks family shop, write a meal plan for the week on the promise of buying a weeks food?

500smiles Sun 30-Nov-14 07:15:17

How about instead of giving him cash you pay for a weeks groceries to be delivered.

Ok you might need some ready made pasta sauces in there but at least he can feed himself.

Hereshoping1 Sun 30-Nov-14 09:39:42

Some great suggestions there, thanks!

lljkk Sun 30-Nov-14 09:48:06

I wouldn't send him groceries, the food he doesn't like will just rot.
Invite him around once a week for a proper meal instead.

Hereshoping1 Sun 30-Nov-14 10:05:27

Have just looked - Sainsburys do a card which I can put money to spend on food. Quite expensive tho! Don't think Lidl or Tescos do, unless anyone knows otherwise?

Timeforabiscuit Sun 30-Nov-14 11:37:39

It is a skill he will need to learn himself to an extent - getting some decent kitchen equipment like a sharp cooks knife might be a better investment?

Or invite yourselves round and he can cook for you? If you offer £15 he'll have to cook a meal rather than get a take away (evil)

Hereshoping1 Sun 30-Nov-14 12:38:42

Nice idea! What about offering to pay for a weekly shop (up to a certain amount) on production of a receipt? He can text a photo of it and I would reimburse him?

specialsubject Sun 30-Nov-14 13:25:04

don't pay for a week of perishables, they will just go to waste.

is this ignorance (unlikely if he went to school) or bloody-mindedness? If the latter, explain once more how it is very stupid, selfish and entitled to wreck good health by bone-headed eating, and then leave him to it.

when he gets ill, he'll learn. There have apparently been cases of tourist scurvy among the gappie community who go on their long holidays and take in nothing except pot noodles and booze. They are usually educated enough to stop themselves dying

Timeforabiscuit Sun 30-Nov-14 13:29:30

Hhmm I'd say too much of a grey area, and source of arguments - I'd be peed off at someone scrutinising my shopping list regardless of good intentions (and payment!).

At the end of the day he is looking for a quick easy tasty option - the trick is to make it nutritous, does he like stir fries? maybe a leaving present of family favourite recipes?

lljkk Sun 30-Nov-14 17:48:34

Text a photo & reimburse sounds way too interfering. Can you imagine the MN thread title.

"My new boyfriend's mum pays him to eat healthy. Is that weird?"

purpleroses Sun 30-Nov-14 17:56:37

Are there a few halfway healthy meals he might make for himself? Beans on toast? Pasta with veg and cheese? Etc Healthy food doesn't need to be fresh food, but to cook properly you do need a reasonable range of kitchen cupboard ingredients, so I would buy those for him. Eg rice, pastsa, tuna, tinned beans and veg, mixed herbs, chilli sauce, cereal, tea and coffee, etc. Those sort of things don't perish but do make it much easier to start eating healthily on a limited budget. Also check he has adequate pans and utensils, and buy him a student-style cook book

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