Boyfriends.. how old was your dd?

[Yeehaw]

Dd1 seems to have acquired a boyfriend she's in year 9 and 14. I am not too fussed but dh thinks she's too young. I am sure I had a boyfriend at 14. None of her friends seem to have one so not sure what the usual age is

[BOFtastic]

About the same. I was thirteen myself. I don't think it's too young, but obviously you have to put some boundaries in place as a parent.

[crazynanna]

DD was/is 15 when had first boyfriend, but she only started her period 6 months ago, so not sure if the surge in hormones enabled.

She blew him out though...he was a bit of a "dick", apparently

[bruffin]

Ds was 14 but dd is 16 and mot had a boy friend

[BackforGood]

dd is 15 and in Yr10 and doesn't have a boyfriend (although has lots of friends who are boys, just doesn't see them in this light yet). Amongst her friendship group of about 8, there's only one who has, or has had a boyfriend that I'm aware of.
Neices aways at University now and didn't start having boyfriends until 6th form.
I have a ds who is 17, and similar there - it seems to be much more of a 6th form thing - I only know of one of his quite large friendship group who had a steady girlfriend before 6th form.

[chocoluvva]

DD was 14. It lasted 3 months and involved holding-hands, hugs, and a kiss goodbye. They didn't visit each other's homes very frequently - neither were round for dinner or anything like that and didn't have time for much in the way of dating - there was a skating date and a couple of walks IIRC. I was in a panic at the time but in hindsight it was very sweet.

He was such a nice boy and they're still good friends even though they both now have a different BF/GF. (looks back at that time fondly)

[mrsjay]

dd1 was 13/14 she went out with him for 2 years dd2 was 15 last about 6 weeks

[mrsjay]

dd1 is still friends with her first boyfriend he has recently came out as gay

[bigTillyMint]

DD had a boyfriend in Y9, for about 6mths and they did go out and do stuff/watch each other doing their sport/he came round here quite a bit.

[NigellasDealer]

i think she was 12 or 13 but they are stilll together and she is 15.
all their friends call her 'Mrs. Boyfriend's surname' it is so sweet.
if it is any comfort to your DH they do not actually see that much of each other outside school.
I have had 'the talk' with her mind.

[mrsjay]

he has recently came out as gay

not sure why i shared that

[Yeehaw]

They are at different schools. I think they really like each other. He seems like a very nice boy. He does the same sport as dd which is good as she is now very motivated to train

They meet up in town for an hour or so once a week. She was in a sports thing yesterday and he ran the 3 miles to see her for 5 minutes

[teenagetantrums]

My DD was 13, lasted 2 years, since then she has had a few non serious relationships. I think its ok, but I believed my DD when she said she wasn't having sex and then we had the trauma of an abortion at 14 just so you know.

[Innogen]

14/15. 14 isn't too young. It's incredibly average.

[Yeehaw]

Teenagetantrums what can you do though if they say they aren't having sex?

[NigellasDealer]

that is my worry tbh

[bigTillyMint]

Oh teenage

DD split with hers when he wanted to take it further. I was so proud of her for standing firm on what she wanted

[Yeehaw]

She actually hasn't started her periods yet. I might talk to her about being able to get pg anyway

[Innogen]

Very good idea OP. I've heard horror stories about getting pregnant before your first period actually. You are fertile from your first ovulation - so before the first period makes an appearance.

[Yeehaw]

The more I think about this the more uncomfortable I feel. I am being unreasonable as he's a nice boy, she's a hard working girl. I think I had 15 in my mind as the 'perfect' age for a boyfriend. What if he dumps her? What if she dumps him and then its all awkward? The whole thing is such a nuisance! This is a vent by the way, she's my oldest so it all seems weird. Thanks for listening.

[mrsjay]

if they fall out it will be awkward for a while but dont fret about it they will be fine he seems a nice boy

[Yeehaw]

yes and he plays the violin - i mean how bad can he be?!!

dh thinks that logic is crazy talk btw

[mrsjay]

My husband doesn't want my dd and her boyfriend sharing a room while they are on holiday they are 21 and 22 dads are weird about this imo , and we were parents at that age fgs

[Yeehaw]

lol

so funny as dh seemed so unsentimental about dd1 until now. I am quite into it, I gave him a lift yesterday for literally 200m just so I could check him out

[littlegreenlight1]

DD is 16 and has had her first bf since some time late last year. I found out this weekend they have had sex.
She is on the pill and using condoms, so other than that - hes as lovely as I could hope for - and Ive asked her if she wanted to etc and she did - I cant stress too much.

I think year 9 is fine, but as long asyouve had many chats about respecting herself etc. My son is that age with a gf and I have talked a lot about what kind of man he is etc.

[chocoluvva]

"she's my eldest, so it all seems weird". I completely understand. I was verging on being traumatised when I discovered that DD had a BF at that age!

Giving lifts is a great way of getting to know them, especially if you get the chance to give a car load of their friends a lift - keep very quiet and they sometimes forget you're there

My DD and her BF were very busy. IMO that's a good strategy for decreasing the number of opportunities they have for seeing each other - not that I'd be disapproving, it's just I wouldn't want to actively encourage it.