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Help with situation with 13 yr old daughter

(5 Posts)
BeTheHokeyMan Sun 23-Mar-14 15:37:02

I dont know what to do here i know i probably sound like a completly useless parent here but im at a complete loss as to whst to do.Long story short my daughter is 13 and has decided she hates me and where we live and wants to go live with her dad in a town over 4 hours away.We live rurally but she has a group of friebds here but complains theres 'nothing to do'. She has been incedibly snappy and moody lately nothing i do is right.Ive tried talking to her but she just says im stupid and mean.Ive tried grounding her and removing her phone neither works.Ive tried positive rewarding to no avail.She literely sad So here i am i dont know what to do - do i leave her go and see the grass isnt greener.It will certainly be a shock for her as she has never even stayed with her dad never mind live with him!My parents also live in the town he does so when she goes to see them he will take her out for a few hours( disney dad) i.Theres also the added hasdle of havibg to switch schopls buy new uniforms etc.My heart is in my mouth as i dont know what to do should i just tell her to hush up this is my house my rules or should i leave her go.I apologise for rambling i have no one else in RL to sound this out with

BeTheHokeyMan Sun 23-Mar-14 15:39:30

apologies about the mistakes i am on my stupid mobile

cory Mon 24-Mar-14 08:56:09

How about explaining that you understand her feelings, that you recognise that she misses the opportunities of the city, but that it's only for a limited time and then she will be able to choose where she lives?

After all, there is nothing wrong with not wanting to live in the country- it's just that it isn't practical for her just at the moment. I grew up in a small town far from everything. I hated it. But fortunately my mother hated it too, so there was no conflict. I shot off to the big city the week after I left school and have never lived anywhere small or rural since. I don't think that makes me a bad person.

A few years ago, I had the option of emigrating. Dd thought she would be happier in the other country. Dh and I did not believe it was a good idea. In the end we didn't. But we did have to live through a few months when dd was very angry with us and blamed us for refusing to do something she felt would turn her life around. The best we could do was listen to her frustration but stick to our course.

RareDayCasting Tue 25-Mar-14 17:29:20

Hi everyone,
There's a new post in the Media requests thread looking for people with troublesome teens - can you take a look and get in touch if this is you?
Thank you!

BeTheHokeyMan Wed 02-Apr-14 09:46:13

Thank u so much for the advice i appreciate you taking the time to reply.Sat down gave myself a good talking to ,took a few deep breaths and had a long chat with her.Things are much better now smile

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