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DD 16 wants to go to Reading Festival after GCSE's

(50 Posts)
bevelino Sun 12-Jan-14 23:49:16

Is it ok to let dd aged 16 go to Reading Festival unaccompanied with 20 school friends this year? Siblings aged 13 also want to go but have said no to them.

mummytime Thu 16-Jan-14 11:57:48

I'd rather mine went to Reading than to Newquay/Rock/Ibiza post GCSE, as there is a point beyond Drink, Drugs and Sex. But then it's close to home and they have relatives in the town.
The oldest two haven't actually indicated they might want to go though. (More likely to go to the local one I think.)

Milliways Thu 16-Jan-14 21:35:36

Mine have both been - but we live close enough for them to come home daily for a shower!

DS is an August birthday and chose not to go the Summer he turned , and said he was glad as REALLY enjoyed it the next Summer and said he would have found it a bit "full-on" if he had gone at "just" 16.
He prefers V Fest but as Reading is so close, went back last SUmmer and is hoping to meet all his mates back from Uni this year.

If they stay in a group they will be fine. The tent burning phase has passed - DS saw none of that - he said the fire wardens are SO strict on the last night - no fires at all allowed. Food is MUCH cheaper and better quality just outside the site. DS got food poisoning the one time he ate on-site, and said the welfare tent was amazing in looking after him - giving him a mat & blanket to sleep on whilst someone keeps an eye on you after being checked over. There are lots of medics and support groups around.

I'd let her go but insist she texts you/sends a FB message each day to let you know she's alright, and pick her up Sunday night after the last headliner before all the arseholes start setting the place alight smile

On the whole Reading is a great experience (as long as your DD is a bit streetwise and knows what trouble looks like, and how to avoid said trouble!)

Winniethepee Sat 25-Jan-14 02:02:21

An August child,my dd is the youngest in her school year.Imagine my horror when i asked what she wanted from Santa,Xmas 2012 and she replied 'reading festival ticket' After all,'all her friends were going'
Except,of course,the 'saddos'
My baby amongst the boozy,stoned,sexual predators with dubious musical taste?blazing tents,petty crime,and wasn't there a rape a couple of years back? Intolerable.
Started researching....Thames Valley police have some useful info,previous attendees likewise.Shared concerns with dd's friends of whom was going to festival. Realised that alcohol,other drugs,sexual predators are part of our society and,to date dd coped responsibly with parties,sleepovers etc. Then dd master stroke.(sexist term?). ' know how you were a steward at Glasto?Maybe you could work at Reading?' Well readers,I did,and it put my mind at rest. Naturally I kept a respectful distance,appearing briefly to deliver cider ration.However,being in situ with a daily text was reassuring,certainly for me.
Daughter loved the festival,witnessed some d'head behaviour,ate more crap than usual and made another step into young adulthood.
For the more protective parent,like myself,maybe consider giving yr beloved& a couple of friends a lift and spending the weekend somewhere nearby.....

otpot Mon 24-Mar-14 08:58:48

hah this is very current in our household. I too have a small, blond gorgeous girl who is going (eek) It seems to be the post GCSE thing. The burning tent thing terrifies me (they do check no one is inside?) however she is going with a group and I've told her to stay in the group at all times. Also we are already chatting about drugs (just don't do it!!) - don;t carry anything for anyone else - a criminal record for possession would stop all number of careers, and the best one- you can never go to new york as the USA won't let you in. To be honest its not the drink and drugs I'm worried about (I think they are exposed to that in everyday life) I'm more concerned about things like her losing her glasses or having all her stuff stolen. I'm going to watch this thread like a hawk for top tips (i.e. the cheap mobile phone etc)

littlegreenlight1 Mon 24-Mar-14 12:43:57

This is great to read, DD is doing a festival and is 16 and Ive been going mad about it but I think at that age they are ok.
I did it at her age, so not a leg to stand on!

notquiteruralbliss Wed 09-Apr-14 00:10:22

My eldest went gorgeous the first time at 15 and loved it. Reading is a perfect first solo festival for 15 to 17 year olds.

tara49 Sat 12-Apr-14 05:43:07

I know it's a different set of worries for a boy but my DS is sixteen next week and has reading tix for his BD. I also know he's tried alcohol in the last year so won't tell him not to - just to be aware and moderate, same for weed but will try my best to terrify him about anything stronger. 16 with a group of good friends, the odd cider and a joint - ah, I remember it we'll...she'll have a ball!

AngryBeaver Sat 12-Apr-14 09:27:56! That's a massive sweeping statement!
I was an attractive 16 year old, not THAT long ago.
But I wasn't ready for sex until I was 18. I'm hoping my dd will be the same.
Saying someone's child lost their virginity "loooong" before they were 16 is a bit unpleasant, imo.
That may well be the case, it may not?

I think the op is worried about her child's general safety and nothing specific.

I personally, don't think I would let my dc go at 16 (I have been to festivals and think maybe it's too young, but would depend on the child) but each to there own.

And the op,seems happy that her dd can be trusted to keep herself safe. All good.

Martorana Sat 12-Apr-14 09:34:14

I would be a bit worried about such a big group, to be honest. I think a first festival is best with a group of 4-or 6 at the most- good friends. Always an even number, so they can go everywhere in pairs. With a huge group it's easy for people to opt out of the"looking out for each other" role.

bevelino Sat 12-Apr-14 21:11:51

Due to all the anxiety amongst the parents of dd's friendship group about them all going to Reading Festival post GCSE dh and I are also now going. I won't be cramping dd's style and we will be in a separate tent, but at least we will be nearby. I am trying to convince myself (unsuccessfully so far) that it will be fun!

GwenStacy Sat 12-Apr-14 21:26:30

Can I really suggest you don't padlock a tent? I've been to numerous festivals, including Reading for several years, and padlocking a tent generally means people assume there's something worth nicking and will just slash it to get in.

For the last few years we've rented lockers from these guys and stuck car keys, cash etc in, just taking out what we need each day- you can charge your phone in them as well smile

If you are going to keep any valuables in your tent overnight, keep them away from the door - we've had chancers opening our tent at night before, claiming they thought it was their tent, but having all out stuff away from the door means it's safer smile

AnarchoSyndicalistMumofthree Wed 16-Apr-14 00:00:12

Absolutely! it is a great British tradition - getting high with your friends and many like minded people for a dance in a field! A coming of age experience I don't doubt.



Fatcontroller1 Thu 17-Apr-14 14:54:21

My DD is going to Reading post GCSE. Originally thought she was going with friend and parents but since found out parents not going at all and there's a bunch of about 10 of her friends. She plans to drive down with a 17 yr old who has just passed his test ..... It's about 110 miles away from us. I'm unhappy she' s been uneconomical with the truth and not happy for her to drive with a 17 yr old inexperienced driver. What do you all think?

WheresRyder Thu 17-Apr-14 14:56:48

ds1 went for the first time 2 years ago, so was 15, we do live just outside reading though so 30 minutes on bus and hes home.

MillyMollyMama Thu 17-Apr-14 17:49:06

I took my DD to Reading, used their drop off point in the town centre , and she met up with friends at the campsite. They ended up being a group of 20 but they did look out for each other. However, it is rougher than other festivals and she much prefers V.

What you need to know is that the mosh pits are wild and the boys go mad! They tread over anything and anyone. The medics are so busy dealing with fairly major emergencies, my DDs friend who was badly trodden on and had an extremely swollen foot was never seen by a medic. She had to be collected by a parent. Things are stolen. No-one sleeps because of tent torching rumours. The music was too heavy for DD and she only went the once, aged 17. Her's and her boyfriend's wellies were stolen. All in all, V usually gets a great line up and there is no agro. Both mine have been several times and it is definitely more of a girls' event. Considerably less boozing and not so wild. Reading is raw and macho. Suits some, not others. Cautious parents should consider V, definitely. However, if your DC wants to see the Reading line up, then only Reading will do. I would never let mine be driven by a young boy to and from Reading. Take her yourself!

Recently overheard in our village: "My DD is going to her first festival this year - Reading. It will be such a wonderful experience. Camping, fresh air, cooking out in the open, such fun!!"" Haha!!

hoboken Thu 17-Apr-14 17:53:58

DD went at 16 and had a fantastic time. No ill effects other than fatigue!

Worriedmum65 Wed 04-Jan-17 09:37:16

My 16 year old wants to go to Reading. I wonder whether I am giving her too much freedom. All of her friends are going following GCSEs but her elder sister 18 is horrified I am letting her go when she wasn't allowed last year. Her boyfriend is also going and I am worried I am giving her a free reign to go too far with her boyfriend. I know there is a craze at the moment that at 16 its all systems go but kids grow up far too quickly and sometimes emotionally not ready. Please help its tears and tantrums at home as all friends going. Dad lives in Dubai and said she is too young.

Ouriana Wed 04-Jan-17 09:43:06

You may be better starting a new thread!

Personally I would let her go, however it does seem strange your considering it when you wouldnt let her sister go at that age. Is there any reason you would allow one to go at that age and not the other?

Could both DDs go together then the older one is there to keep an eye on her?

BertrandRussell Wed 04-Jan-17 09:44:14

I wouldn't do Reading as a first festival, to be honest. It's much bigger and more full on than it used to be and a bit grim, to be honest!

My ds and his friends are going to Boardmasters after GCSE.

UsedToBeAPaxmanFan Wed 04-Jan-17 09:52:11

My ds went after GCSEs with loads of his friends, they had a great time. They went again after AS and then last summer after A Levels. Ds came back from it last summer and said he probably wouldn't go again as it was "full of kids" and he felt too old. He turned 18 last summer....

I think it's fine to let them.go af 16+ as long as they understand some basic rules/common sense. We also told ds the first time he went that if, for any reason, he felt uncomfortable or wanted to come home he should fake a migraine or illness and phone to get us to pick him up. That gave him a get out without losing face. Of course he had a great time. I think quite a lot of alcohol may have been involved.

Notso Wed 04-Jan-17 10:02:43

We didn't let DD go to Leeds last year. I've been to loads of festivals and Leeds is not a first one IMO, it's got an edge to it that you don't get in V for example.

SoupDragon Wed 04-Jan-17 10:05:27

zombie thread

Worriedmum65 Wed 04-Jan-17 16:08:46

I think because I didn't realize that it has become a right of passage for 16 year olds. Reading seems to be for youngsters also she is going with a big crowd of girls from her school it is more the boyfriend I am worried about coupled with my memory of festivals .. still not sure elder d be disappointed because she will see as unfair - younger one disappointed because will say not her fault festival at reading changed to suit youngsters ...

woodlands01 Fri 06-Jan-17 20:56:10

Well - I was pleased when my DD and friends were going to Reading as it is fairly local to us so I could easily get there in an emergency. In fact, I offered to bring them home every night so they could shower and sleep but they weren't having that......
But, they are now off to BoardMasters?' in Newquay. Seems the popular choice at their secondary school. Husband not happy but I am more relaxed. They will be 16, there is a large group who will look after each other and if my parents had said no at 16 I would have done it anyway. At least I know where they are. Talking to other Mums - I think all happier if one parent close by so I will offer to stay or camp at Haven or somewhere equally glamorous. I am nervous, but as a PP said WHEN do you let them go??? 16, 17, 18 ... 25?

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