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Can you recommend a book on parenting teenagers before I throttle DD(12)?

(13 Posts)
chicaguapa Mon 23-Sep-13 20:33:11

DD(12) is seriously testing the boundaries at the moment. It's as if she's read a book on how teenagers behave and is acting it out.

So I thought I'd commiserate with a book that will give me tips on how to manage her. Part of me thinks if I can't get a handle on it now, the next few years are going to be hell.

Any good ones out there?

TeenAndTween Mon 23-Sep-13 20:39:30

"How to talk so kids will listen" may be helpful.
It's a long time since I actually read it though.

Mintyy Mon 23-Sep-13 20:40:56

Remember that she is at the mercy of her hormones.

They do a teen version of How to Talk too. They are good.

TheFallenNinja Mon 23-Sep-13 20:42:11

War and peace?

Palika Tue 24-Sep-13 16:19:26

Divas and Doorslammers - full of really good and practical advice
Parenting out-of-control teenagers - really good advice too, also for not so out-of-control teens.

We are using all the strategies from these books with very good results.

Also: Nurture shock - some very interesting and counter-intuitive insights here

Avoid: Get out of my life - very defeatist and unhelpful

chicaguapa Tue 24-Sep-13 21:25:03

Great thanks. I'll download some samples from Amazon.

I was thinking War & Peace would be good for lobbing at her. grin

I'm a bit of a diva and doorslammer blush so we've no hope

Takver Wed 25-Sep-13 13:43:21

Very many thanks for starting this thread and for the recommendations smile OP, I've just checked our library catalogue & I can get most of the books mentioned here via them, so might be worth checking out (I figure then if any of them suit I can buy a copy!)

chicaguapa Wed 25-Sep-13 22:35:43

I'm enjoying Divas and Doorslammers. I bought it after reading the sample.

I keep mentioning bits to DH who is aware of (& uses) some of the strategies in class at school himself, so it's obviously based on good research as he reads lots of theory books about teaching.

Knowing about the reptile brain is particularly useful. smile

mollywingate Wed 25-Sep-13 23:22:01

This is pretty self-serving, but you might try Slow Parenting Teens (available on My co-author and I help you build a better relationship with you teen (which we call ages 12 -22) so you can have a positive, respectful, and fun relationship now and always. It is a quick read, has example conversations, and we have online community for support, if you wish. More at

fifietta Thu 26-Sep-13 10:39:21

I read 'divas and doorslammers' which is okay for the beginning of teen difficulties but useless if your teen isn't motivated by money. At 12 she probably is! 'How to talk so teens will listen and listen so teens will talk' is also good.

The most realistic book I've read though, is this one: '

which helped me not to take it all too personally!

fifietta Thu 26-Sep-13 10:41:22

Disagree with Palika...Get out of my life is very good when you're really struggling, even if the 'dialogues' in it are a bit contrived.

BackforGood Thu 26-Sep-13 22:50:33

I liked 'Get out of my life but first take me and Alex into town' as well - thought it was a great read.
Also quite good was How to talk..

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