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Parenting teenagers has its ups and downs. Get advice from Mumsnetters here.

Parenting teenagers has its ups and downs. Get advice from Mumsnetters here.

Teenagers

Imagine you're a 15 year old boy...

17 replies

ThreeBeeOneGee · 12/06/2013 20:30

DS1 may have the opportunity to visit Japan with the Scouts in two years, when he'll be 15.

DH & I both agree that DS1 should go if he wants to. He will have two years to try and earn / raise most of the cost, and we could pay for the rest with that long to save for it.

There is also the possibility that DH could go. He is a Scout leader and could go as the medic, which means his place would be subsidised as he'd be working.

The question is: if you were a 15 year old boy travelling to the other side of the world with your friends on the trip of a lifetime, would it bother you to have your dad tagging along as part of the supervising team?

OP posts:

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Turniptwirl · 12/06/2013 20:31

To be honest, some kids would love it and some would hate it. Can you ask your son how he'd feel abou it

KittieCat · 12/06/2013 20:32

I would (secretly) be very pleased if I were him. It's a long way to go and if I'd been him it would have made me happier knowing my dad was going too.

What a great opportunity for your DS.

fridayfreedom · 12/06/2013 23:33

Am assuming that it is the World scout jamboree, my daughter went to the last one and had a fab time.
If he gets picked they may not even be in the same group but if they , when they got there they weren't with all their leaders all the time so chances are they will have loads of time apart. The campsite will be huge so loads of space to lose each other in!
Re fundraising, start early and try and do it with other local scouts who are also going. Approach local organisations, lions, rotary etc and be prepared to do talks for them on return. Hope he gets picked!

doolallylass · 12/06/2013 23:36

I think I'd like it (less pressure if Dad's there) and even if I moaned I'd really appreciate having taken such a significant trip with my Dad when I'm older.

MrsFrederickWentworth · 12/06/2013 23:36

I would hide the pleasure and instruct DF to keep off my back and not embarrass me and give him a hard time but secretly I would be hugely reassured and it would be a lovely thing to look back on when I was old and grey and full of sleep.

allinatizz · 12/06/2013 23:40

I agree with all of the above. :)

cory · 13/06/2013 07:42

That would depend on the dad. Mine would have been fine, my friend's would have been a huge embarrassment. But if your dh can be tactful and keep a professional distance, then should be great.

ThreeBeeOneGee · 13/06/2013 08:00

Thank you all for responding, and special mention to fridayfreedom for the tips about the Jamboree.

OP posts:

BackforGood · 14/06/2013 16:00

My ds went to the WSJ in Sweden too.
I'm not clear from your post if your dh is applying to be your ds's Unit Leader, or as part of the IST. If it's the IST, then no problem at all.... the site will be massive and they may not bump into each other all week. If it's the Unit Leader, then it depends on your ds / dh's relationship. Some wouldn't mind, some would. If your ds is not keen, then your dh should step down IMO, as he can go to America in 2019, or wherever the 2023 one is, but your ds only gets one opportunity to go.

We had a set of siblings both selected in ds's Unit - caused a lot of stress with the fundraising, tbh. Obviously that's the only chance they would both get to go, so understandable, but I think if you are talking about an adult, then it would be easier to go to 2 sep. Jamborees.

By the way, if he gets selected, it is just THE most fantastic experience, which ds is still raving about 2 yrs on. My dd is applying this time! Good luck to your ds

PointeShoes · 14/06/2013 16:05

I doubt he will still be in scouts by then

Isthiscorrect · 16/06/2013 14:56

Point shoes why would you say that? Scouting is very popular,just because by your name it's not your kind of thing.. Good luck to the op and her son. It will be a fantastic experience for him. Do ask your son if he minds, but agree with other poster that experience indicates they won't have much to do with each other.

BackforGood · 16/06/2013 21:32

Do you mean OP's dh, Pointeshoes ? Why would you think he would have left ?

Fraxinus · 16/06/2013 22:10

It's not the same as having your dad tag along to the lads' first holiday alone, is it? I'm sure it will work out fine.

ThreeBeeOneGee · 17/06/2013 07:17

As far as DH is concerned, I think he'll carry on helping until DS3 moves up to Explorer Scouts in 2018, if not longer.

I don't know which team he would be applying for, he just said there was the possibility he could go as the medic.

I think DS1 will keep going with Scouts, partly because most of his group of friends do it.

I appreciate the input and advice, but all this has become moot now, because we asked DS1 and he strongly doesn't want to go to the WSJ, whether or not his dad is there. DS1 has had a difficult year (bereavement etc) so we're not going to push it.

OP posts:

fridayfreedom · 17/06/2013 07:32

If he strongly doesn't want to go then it really isn't worth pushing it as you say.
They have to be selected first and if they are selected it is a LOT of work to raise the money and to go to all the training camps.
We had to pay £200 deposit, non returnable, and there needs to be a committment to stay in Scouting until after the WSJ.
If he isn't keen it's not worth it. Maybe he could focus on other big camps, there is 0014 in Hampshire next year. He could ask if his troop is interested in going.

ThreeBeeOneGee · 17/06/2013 08:01

Thanks, will ask about Hampshire. He's up for a Scout sailing camp in Norfolk in September, which sounds good.

OP posts:

BackforGood · 17/06/2013 09:53

Agree with Friday. There are lots of international jamborees you can go to. See if he can persuade his troop / unit/group to go to BrumJam in 2016. The 2012 inaugaral one was fab.

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