DD1 is 14 this year, shes moved high school twice now due to our moving home and her not settling at the new high and bullying. She lies to the other kids about stuff and then when they call her bluff she lies again, says it wasnt her etc etc, ends in tears, or she will do something to get attention then say she didnt. Shes like this at home as well, horrid to DD2, breaks things,steals things etc We now have to go into school as another incident happened today. I do not know what to do to help her, alot of it goes on via FB or text, to I take away her phone and internet? Do I punish her? We have tried to tell her this is not how she wants to live her life, no one wants to be friends with her now and shes begging to move/be home schooled which is not up for consideration. Deep down she is a lovely girl who can be kind/funny/loving, but all we get is cheek/lies and attitude and its getting too much.
Your dd's behaviour is attention seeking and sounds like she is struggling with growing up, which will hopefully pass in time. Are you able to let her know that you have "wiped the slate clean" and she can have a fresh start regarding her behaviour? This would need conditions attached including talking to you each day and letting you help her make the right decisions about her attitude and behaviour, both inside and outside the home.
Being a teen is hard and I see my own 4 dd's struggling at times. We have lots of communication and they always try to be nice to each other at home which leaves them feeling safe and secure.