DD cutting herself

[SkaffenAmtiskaw]

I have just found my DD has been cutting her arms :(

I feel terrible, I should have known, I did see the cuts but she came up with a rather unconvincing explanation that I chose to believe. She's suffered a serious trauma a few months ago and I thought she had been coping well but obviously that's not the case. I should have done more to help her with that.

So tonight she admitted she had been cutting because she felt bad inside and she didn't know what else to do. I told her if she ever felt that way again, to ask for help from me or another grown up and to not cut herself. She's going to go and see the counselor at school next week and I'm going to take her to the GP to see if we can get a referral to CAMHS.

Is there anything else I can do to help her? I'd be ever so grateful for any advice, thanks in advance.

[notahotel]

Hi, Skaffen - this has happened to me very recently, too (read my thread: DD self-harming for two years - just told me. Please help!) I've had some great advice from people on MN and also good support from the school and GP. It's great that your DD has talked to you and you sound as if you're doing all the same things that I'm doing. I can't give you much advice as I'm new to this, too, but I do understand exactly how you're feeling! Good luck with the GP.

[SkaffenAmtiskaw]

Thanks hotel, I did see your thread after I posted and read it, I'm so sorry you and your DD are going through this. The advice you've had on your thread confirmed that I was doing the right things so it's been very helpful to read. Good luck with everything.

[SkaffenAmtiskaw]

Thanks Mindfulmum. I haven't seen the GP or the school counsellor yet as it only came up last thursday evening, the earliest I could get an appointment with GP (phone appointment) is tomorrow. DD should be seeing the school counsellor this week. I think I will try to speak to him/her before that.

I think for my DD at least it was more a cry for help than anything else. She's only just started and obviously wanted to be found out (she wasn't hiding the cuts and the knife she used was the first thing I saw wehn I went in her bedroom).

I have not been judgemental (I hope!) and when we spoke I explained to her there are other ways to deal with her pain and anger (which is to do with something that happened with her father, I had a thread back in December). I did not tell her not to do it, but obviously I was upset and she saw that. What upset me most, though, was that she felt she couldn't come to me with her troubles. I thought she knew that I would be on her side and help her no matter what.

I feel really guilty that I didn't organise professional help earlier after the incident with her father, I did tell her she only had to say if she felt she couldn't cope, but she seemed to cope on the whole. I should have known she needed help, I feel so bad that I let her down.