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Such a bloody struggle!

(5 Posts)
maristella Wed 17-Apr-13 20:58:59

DS is 15, and he's pushing me to my limit.

He won't do schoolwork unless I literally make him do it. My DP has lent him something on condition he does it, but he needs to be policed doing it or he won't, and even then I face the wrath of his anger.
Before DP lent him this thing DS had not done any homework of his own accord for over 3 years.
Weekly detentions, and is now excluded for swearing like a navvy at the teachers.

I've raised him myself, I've fought tooth and nail for that boy. I've protected and defended him.
I get daily contempt. i get glared at with absolute hatred. I get sneered at.

If I tell him off, or ask him to do something, he squares up to me. He also makes it clear that if I upset him he will get depressed and he makes it clear that I can't risk that.

I'm being manipulated. I'm being bullied, and tonight I've been intimidated.

I threw him out of the house, told him he can come back when he can show respect to me. I thought he would lump me one, so I literally dragged and pushed him out the door.

He's now with family. And I had to hear this from someone else. Family are loooving this angry

ZZZenagain Wed 17-Apr-13 21:04:14

how difficult for you. Why are your family loving this and why are they not helping you with it?

maristella Wed 17-Apr-13 21:09:30

They're a bit toxic <understatement>

Last year I had to cut contact with them because they were using him to hurt me, but this messed with his head. I have let them back in on my terms only.

But DS keeps behaving like my brother, like a sneering misogynistic bully.

maristella Thu 18-Apr-13 09:54:24

He's back, he has a foul attitude still. Honestly I don't know what to do.
I've battled so much to get support in place for him, he has school counsellor and there's extra support available to him for school work. It's now down to him hmm

ZZZenagain Thu 18-Apr-13 10:21:42

I am glad he is back but this sounds very difficult. I hope the school counsellor is able to help. I am afraid I don't know anything about this from first-hand (well perhaps I am relieved about that). My dd is younger so we haven't reached this point yet.

Is there anyone you could see who could help guide you through this? I really wouldn't know how to tackle this without getting really exasperated, and probably very angry. I wonder if there is a family guidance therapist who you could speak to.

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